How To Overcome Self-Doubt

Self-doubt is a thieve, it always has been and it always will be if we keep allowing it to be.

We all experience self-doubt at one point and some of us choose to thrive beyond it and others choose to get overwhelmed by it.

The problem with self-doubt is that we give into it for long, and it clouds our judgment and holds us back. We allow it more power over us than we ever should.

Recently I’ve been doubting myself and felt discouraged because of it. My usual self-esteem was nowhere to be seen. I am not one to doubt myself easily, but it crept up on me and I struggled to shake the feeling.

What made me doubt myself? Going through Pinterest and trying to find ways to better this blog I came across multiple bloggers who claim to make 6-7 figures from blogging a year or make $1 000’s a month, and I started to compare myself and my earnings to these standards and started to feel like such a huge failure.

We should learn to redirect our self-doubt, trust in the process, trust in ourselves, keep pushing forward, and not compare ourselves to others. We should learn to build our self-esteem.

I know that so many people doubt themselves, and I hope that this post will help change that. I hope this post can motivate you, inspire you, and build confidence in yourself.

Without further ado let me show you how to overcome self-doubt.

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What is Self-Doubt

Self-doubt put simply is a lack of confidence, trust, and certainty in your abilities.

The Vibration of Self-Doubt

As you can see, feeling doubt is one of the lower vibrations.

Energy flows where attention goes. The more you focus on doubt the more the things you don’t want will find a way to manifest into your life.

And the more you focus on the doubt you feel, the more you will reaffirm to yourself that you are unworthy or incapable or not good enough.

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The Healthy Side of Self-Doubt

There is always a good side to negative emotions/circumstances. Experiencing doubt is normal and even needed sometimes.

https://mymoodpath.com/en/magazin/self-doubt/

What’s your level of self-doubt?

https://www.berkeleywellbeing.com/self-doubt.html
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🌸Comparing ourselves to others🌸

It is so easy to compare ourselves and our progress to other people and their progress. We compare ourselves to them in such a negative way that we begin to get discouraged and want to give up on whatever we’re doing.

Social media gives us easy access to amazing people to whom we compare ourselves without a second thought. We look at all they have achieved and try to compete with hundreds and even thousands of people. This is a fast track to doubting yourself.

Thank you CattleCapers for your contribution.

3 Levels of self-comparison

🌸Having expectations for a certain outcome🌸

We put so much pressure on ourselves to get to a certain outcome. We become disappointed and discouraged when we don’t achieve a certain level of success in a certain amount of time.

🌸Imposter Syndrome🌸

Imposter syndrome is that small voice that tells you that you are a fraud, that questions your credibility for doing things, and makes you feel undeserving of your achieved successes. 

🌸Questioning our abilities/thoughts/beliefs🌸

Usually, when we experience a change in mindset we start to question the path we’re on and our actions and influences on it.

This may not always be a bad thing, but it can lead to self-doubt.

🌸Important people who are negative🌸

We sometimes value the opinions of people close to us over our own, or we start to question whether our own thoughts are valuable.

🌸Encountering setbacks/obstacles🌸

When things don’t turn out the way we had hoped we tend to become negative and let doubt seep into our core.

Feeling stuck is also another gateway to self-doubt.

Self-doubt is a Thieve

Self-doubt steals from us because we allow it to. It keeps us from moving forward and can even cause us to go backward. It steals our confidence, our trust in our abilities, our trust in God/The Universe, and our trust in the path we have chosen for ourselves.

So many people of greatness, people who have achieved and created amazing things have experienced doubt and imposter syndrome before, but they didn’t allow it to stop them, and you shouldn’t either.

Let’s say that you continue to doubt yourself and throw all your goals and already achieved accomplishments in the dustbin. Where would you be in a week from now? still doubting whether you are worthy… In a month from now? wanting to go back, try again, but still doubting yourself… In a year from now? most likely full of regret. Ten years from now? maybe you’ll wonder why you were so caught up in your thoughts and didn’t just hold on a little longer and push through to see where it might’ve led you.

Doubting ourselves is to put ourselves on a path of regret and what-ifs, rather than lessons learned and successes gained.

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How to Eliminate Self-Doubt

I overcame my self-doubt by reminding myself to simply take the next step and not look at the whole staircase and trusting that I am getting to my destination at my own time and speed and that I have nothing to rush, nothing to worry about, and no one to compare myself with.

🌸Whatever you are in doubt of, continue doing it anyways🌸

Push through. Keep on taking the necessary actions, even when you are in doubt. Don’t allow doubt to hold you back.

“If you hear a voice within you say you cannot paint, then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced.”

– Vincent Van Gogh

🌸Strenghten your self-esteem and confidence🌸

Self-doubt is most likely caused by your lack of self-esteem and confidence, therefore it is your job to build it back up again.

  • Use positive self-talk. Be kind and encouraging to yourself. Talk to yourself with love and compassion.
  • Affirmations and Incantations.
  • Focus on your strengths.
  • Build up your knowledge and experience related to what you want to achieve.
  • Do more of what you love.
  • Try something new, step outside of your comfort zone.

Confidence is a skill

🌸Reevaluate your self-worth🌸

Your sense of self-worthiness shouldn’t increase or decrease by external factors like achievements or the opinions of others.

You are worthy simply because. And if you don’t believe that, it is time for a change in your mindset and beliefs.

This also means to not compare yourself to others.

🌸Gain new insights🌸

Look for things and action steps that you can improve upon to have a better experience and outcome.

Find new insights, do some research, and you may find yourself discovering vital pivot points that will give you the necessary push in the right direction.

You can even ask someone you trust for help or honest insights.

🌸Journal🌸

Some journal questions for you:

  • What made you start in the first place?
  • Why did you keep doing it for so long?
  • What have you achieved so far?
  • Are you proud of how far you’ve come?
  • Do you still enjoy doing it?
  • What makes you doubt yourself?… why is this?
  • Would it be worth it to stop now and let doubt have the upper hand?
  • What would happen if you fail?
  • How do you define success

🌸Meditation and breathwork🌸

Meditation helps us look within and reevaluate our mindset and thoughts in a nonjudgemental way.

Breathwork is also great for clearing the mind and taking a step back.

🌸Trust the Process🌸

You’ve already come so far, why stop now? Put a little trust in yourself, believe that you are exactly where you are meant to be and that great things are yet to come.

Learn to trust and keep a positive and open mindset. Learn to trust your abilities and your own path and realize that everything happens as it should. We try too much to control everything, instead, we should let go a little, live a little and put a whole lot of faith and trust in the Universe/God.

🌸Turn to Gratitude🌸

There is always something to be grateful for. Always. Sometimes it is just a little harder to find those things or to be truly grateful. Turning to gratitude is the fastest way to reform your life and help you take the right steps forward with the right mindset.

The power of Gratitude

🌸Take a small break and have a good nights rest and start with a fresh and clear mind🌸

Go to bed and remind yourself that the following day is a new day and a new opportunity to do better. Start your morning with the determination to keep pushing forward.

How you start your morning determines how your day goes

Breaks are necessary for survival

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Inspiring Quotes on Self Doubt

Turning Pain Into Purpose

We all experience pain at some point in our lives. And we have a choice to make; we can either choose to let it consume us and make us bitter at heart or we can choose to turn our pain into something beautiful and meaningful. Pain is without saying an awful feeling, but it is what we choose to do with it that matters.

I created this post to help you through current and past traumas. This post was inspired by Nadia, you will find more about her in this post.

We always have the opportunity to turn any emotion into a form of art.

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How to turn your pain into purpose

Note: Most of these things are easier said than done, but doing it will bring a positive change.

💕Allow yourself to feel

If you want to cry, cry. Let it all out. There is no point in collecting the pain and holding on to it, suppressing it will only turn it into hate and anger that will be directed at the wrong people/things. Just make sure you don’t stay in that depressing place when allowing yourself to completely feel the pain.

💕Try to focus on the solution and not the problem

So now you’ve felt the pain completely, now what? It is time to start moving forward, to find the beauty in all these experiences. Give a meaning to it that will help you move forward positively.

Meanings like: everything happens for a reason; this will make me wiser and stronger; this will help me in future struggles; God/The Universe or whatever you may believe in is preparing you for a happy life etc.

One of the best things that helped me grow recently is to look at my bad memories and finding the good in them. Looking at the person who hurt me, and to remember what I admired in them and still do. To look at the person who hurt me, and feeling grateful for the good and bad, for the bad has made me much wiser and stronger. In the end, the bad wasn’t bad, it was a stepping stone to greatness.

💕Passion/Hobbies

This is a great place to start. Pain is a powerful emotion, and when it is directed to doing things you love doing, the beauty becomes amplified. Focus on doing things that bring you joy and happiness.

💕 It’s about creating the future you deserve

Stop looking back if it causes you more pain.

You are the creator of your own future. Create a life you love. You deserve to live a long, happy, and fulfilled life. Never accept anything less than you deserve.

Who is your ideal self? answer this and work towards that ideal version of you.

💕Set yourself free

You deserve to be free from everything that weighs you down, whether it is the past, pain, grief, hate, etc. you owe it to yourself to be happy.

💕Gratitude

Turning to gratitude is the fastest way to feel better and turn your pain into purpose, for there is always something to be grateful for, sometimes it only takes a bit more effort to find it.

The power of Gratitude

Quotes

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A woman of strength

Nadia Ngcobo (19)

Nadia is the beautiful young lady who inspired todays post. She is truly a remarkable woman. She is kindhearted and passionate, she spreads goodness and empowerement wherever she goes. She has learnt to put her pain towards good.

She speaks at schools and tries to relate to the stories she hears and tries to help people realize that there is a lot that can come out of pain. She tries to empower these students, as well as contribute sanitary pads, school uniforms, cosmetics, etc. by gaining sponsorships and donations.

Her mother physically and emotionally abused her and even deprived her of food. When she was finally taken into custody she learned how to turn her pain into art; by writing and speaking and helping others. She strives to be a better person than her mother was.

Not too long ago she was also sexually harassed and is still working through some emotions. Thank you Nadia for being so strong, and able to share the terrible things that have happened to you, and to still treat people with kindness and love.

Nadia has already accomplished quite a few things in her life. She was deputy head girl at her school. In 2019 she was South Africa Champion in Afrikaans speakers (redenaars) which is an amazing accomplishment. Like I’ve said before, she speaks at schools, contributes to them physically and mentally. Nadia is destined for greatness.

Nadia’s contribution to Youth Day 2021 South Africa

Something extra: This speech landed her a job offer

Here is the Audio from the Voice Of the Community Radio if you would prefer listening to her speak.

THE YOUTH OF TODAY VERSUS THE YOUTH OF 1976

They were bruised, battered, killed and they rioted, fighting for education. 45 years later, was the uprising worth the lives of the youth of 1976, or has their struggle gone down the drain as the youth of today plunges on resources bringing about negative change?

If the mandate was education, why do we still have schools lacking basic infrastructure and study material? We have an education system that focuses more on the theory of things rather than skills that will equip the youth for the outside world ensuring that they are independent and not dependent on foreign manipulated companies.

If education is important, why do we have so many graduates sitting at home because they do not meet the ridiculous job experience requirements and lack employment opportunities? What message are we bringing across to the young ones that are yet to go to university? Universities that financially excluded students because of their historical debts while they have millions sitting in their bank accounts. Is the South African education system still colonized or is its independence constantly being altered to accommodate the standards of the youth? I mean we went from a 50% pass rate to a 30% pass rate that’s a decline in the progression of our education.

With an unemployment rate of 16,9% in 1976 and an increase to 28,48% in 2020, have we progressed or are we going backward as a country with a laid-back youth? What happened to the spirit of Soweto Uprising martyrs? What happened to the fight for quality education? Why can’t we fight for our rights as we fight for Gender-Based Violence, Fees Must Fall, and the acceptance of the LGBQTI+ community? 

We commit crimes because of unemployment. We live in a society where politicians bathe in corruption and take pride in racketeering. How then do we complain about the 0.7% increase in contact crimes? How then do we continue with an increase in youth pregnancies when we have so many pregnancy preventative methods put in place to control the birth rate? Do we care more about our sexual urges or are we breaking the cycle of raising children in dysfunctional and financially struggling households? We prefer graduating in the form of a child rather than in the form of an academic degree. We live off social grants instead of contributing towards social grants.

Is there anything that the youth of today can show the youth of 1976 for their fight towards where we are today? What is freedom if our minds are still enslaved by colonization? Where is the progression? We are not the tomorrow of this country, we are the today, the now of South Africa. When will we wake up and smell the coffee? When will use the South African Youth council to our advantage? How many seats do we occupy in the Parliament? When will we have our own uprising towards unemployment, education, and the history of our country and continent? 

We as the youth should benefit from government set-asides in government procurement. Let enterprises get contracts if they can prove that 25% of their employees are youth. Let the Government develop legislation that will ensure that the private sector procures 50% of its goods from the youth and local enterprises.

As a young person of South Africa, I want to participate in the value chain. I want to have a say in matters that include me.

Can the youth not venture into agriculture without an increase in farm murders? In March 2021, farm murders increased to 35 from 22. When noble laureate Desmond Tutu called us a rainbow nation it was in reference to the diversity in our country and our ability to perhaps one day live in interracial harmony where colour is just colour. Where colour is not a privilege to some and a crime to others. We kill the very farmers that we want to supply us with local organic vegetables and livestock. We kill the very framers that contribute a lot to this country’s agriculture.  

When I look at my fellow peers, I see future Vusi Themekwayo(s), future Ludwick Marishane(s), I see future Addi Pienaar(s) because we have the potential to be far more than what we’re settling for. We’re too comfortable in poverty. We’re too comfortable with this education. We’re too comfortable with racism. We’re too comfortable in being uncomfortable.

I don’t know you but I’m emancipating myself from colonial mental slavery, racism, corruption, Gender-Based Violence, a colonially influenced education system and I’m creating employment opportunities for myself and the future generation. I am emancipating myself from a country that’s taking one step forward and ten steps backward. I am not the tomorrow of South Africa, I am the today of South Africa. I am the now of South Africa.  I am South Africa.

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Questions to Nadia

What are your hobbies?

I crochet, knit, write and sing.

What is the one thing you look forward to when you wake up?

I look forward to talking to My Love, hearing him tell me how his day is and how much he loves me. I look forward to praying with him, for him, and our families. I look forward to laughing with him. I look forward to growing with him

Favorite colour: Black

Favorite song: Best Part

Favorite author: John Green

Favorite food: Mcdonalds burger

Favorite snack: Doritos

Favorite poem: I rise by Maya Angelo

Favorite person: Jean-Pierre (my boyfriend)

What are your three favorite books?

  • A fault in our stars
  • The Great Gatsby
  • Bear The Blessers Game

How do you define success?

Success is being contented with what you have because you worked hard for it. Success is Love. Success is Happiness and Success is Hope.

What fuels your passion?

Pain. Whatever pain I go through I turn it into something positive and also art. My mother and I aren’t close so the pain she brings me drives me to the better.

What do you want to be?

I want to do Law and become a Human rights lawyer. I have been sexually harassed multiple times so I want to fight for those that cannot fight for themselves.

Who do you look up to the most and why?

Myself. I’ve never met anyone as strong as me so I look up to the person I was yesterday because the person I was yesterday drives me to become a better person today.

My mother never encouraged me to do anything, and she was always against anything I did, so I decided that I am not even going to impress her and I am going to prove myself right. I am going to prove to myself that I am the woman who I say I am. That I am a fountain of grace, strength, and prayer. I don’t work to prove anyone wrong, I work to prove myself right.

Make yourself proud

What inspires and motivates you?

My mother’s inability to love me. Pain and will to be everything that my mother isn’t.

What do you believe in and try to promote?

Responsible citizenship and being the Voice of The Oppressed.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

I see myself as a UN speaker representing those that are oppressed by the justice system and men.

How would you describe yourself?

Bold and unapologetic.

5 things you are grateful for

  • Life
  • Family
  • Love
  • Peace
  • Freedom of expression

Do you love yourself?

Yes, I do, to love someone else I need to love myself first.

Would you describe yourself as a confident person?

Yes, I rise above everything with my head held high.

Your best tip on self-love and confidence

Don’t let anyone tell you what you can and cannot be. Never do things to impress people there don’t prove work to prove them wrong, work to prove yourself right.

If you had one year left to live, what would you do?

I would enrich more lives and appreciate the ones I love more.

Do you have any regrets?

Yes. When I got sexually harassed, and my boyfriend warned me but I didn’t listen, if I had listened I wouldn’t have gotten harassed

What are the things you wish to experience and learn about?

I want to experience the love of a mother and learn to forgive and let go of things I cannot control.


What do you think makes life meaningful?

Letting go of the past, living in the present, and looking forward to the future.

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A written piece by Nadia

With tears falling from the corner of her eyes and voice screaming from deep within her soul, he pressed hard against her pride, soul ties that were awaiting marriage, and bold eyes which dug deeper into her soul as she begged for mercy from a merciless cologne infused her purity, silenced her cry and diminished her smile. Even with her eyes closed, she can still see the callous smirk that was once disguised as a courteous young gent raised by an African mother and breastfed by her pain. She felt her insides go numb as her body laid still. Her closed opening burn but the fluids meant to protect her leisurely watching like a wounded activist, stained robes which used to be whiter than the finest grains of virgin snow. Still.. from screaming until her veins mapped the road to Eden, from her hands scratching and pushing to her legs kicking and frozen she went still… for the only voice she had left, was the polluted river whose flows flowed like stretchmarks mapped like the roots of a fruitful apple tree. And even though the sheets were left scarred by a virgin’s cry for mercy. Like the color of her skin, it was her destiny just as it was her ancestors’.


Thank you Nadia for sharing your authentic self 🦋

Can you relate to turning your pain into passion?

Hope you took some value from this post.

Much love and abundance

🙏❤

Set yourself free

🌸🌸🌸

Today I came here bringing you a message -to set yourself free- so that you can go forth happily, thriving, and inspired.

Do you feel trapped by your circumstances, emotions, thoughts, and by the people around you?

Guess what?! so do most of us, but the good thing is that we have the capabilities to set ourselves free, but first we must decide to set ourselves free or continue to feel drained and caged in with nowhere to go. The truth is that happiness is a choice, and happiness also comes with being authentic and free.

Set yourself free from everything holding you back, from your negative beliefs/thoughts, from the past, from self-doubt, from anything that no longer serves you.

k.tolnoe

How to set yourself free

Journal

Take some time to journal and find out what is holding you back. Ask yourself around which topic you’ve felt negative lately? Where in your life do you feel held back and why? What emotions and thoughts are no longer serving me?

I also do these regular affirmations in my journal:

  • I let go of everything that no longer serves me.
  • I let go of all that doesn’t serve my highest self.
  • I release all negative thoughts surrounding _____.
  • I release all that no longer serves me and expand into my highest potential.
  • I turn every negative situation into a positive outcome.
  • I have a growth mentality.
  • Every day I become a better person.
  • With each passing day, my thoughts purify more and more.

Take a step back, and breath

Sometimes a break and a change of perspective are all we need to continue forward. Start seeing your challenges as opportunities for growth.

Get clear on who you are, who you want to become, and what you expect out of life.

Awarness is always key!

Take out a journal and jot everything down, and be truly honest with yourself. Figure out who you are, what your values are, what will bring you more happiness, what do you stand for, what will fuel your passion, what you can do to better your life, etc.

Don’t obsess over results

Focusing on goals can become a problem because it makes us prisoners of those goals, and we only laser-focus on results. By focusing on developing the right habits, i.e., on processes, it becomes easy for us to do the things necessary for living an awesome life.

Focus on developing the right habits and to set yourself free from being obsessed with results!

One Percent Better Team

In short, become progress/habit orientated instead of result orientated.

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Get clear on your goals and vision

By knowing your goals, you can live your life accordingly Working towards something that you want to achieve for yourself will make you a lot more fulfilled and happy and make you feel less trapped or lost.

Perfection is an illusion

Stop striving for ultimate perfection, there is no such thing. By trying to be too perfect you will start to lose interest and motivation and go into a spiral of self-critique.

Push through

Sometimes the only thing we can do is keep our mouths shut and push through. In a way, this is also stepping outside of your comfort zone because you are doing something that you don’t necessarily want to do but most probably have to do.

Authenticity ~ Be your true self

Be you and do you. You don’t have to put on a fake facade to please others, the only person you need to please is you. Embrace your imperfections.

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Work on yourself

Learn to love the person you are while working on becoming your ideal version of yourself.

There is no better project than yourself. When you become the greatest version of yourself, you can serve the world on a higher and more authentic level.

Stop seeking outer validation and approval

Seeking approval from others is a path of destruction. Why do we seek approval though? because of low self-esteem, because we are mean to ourselves and need others to validate our good characteristics.

Start approving of yourself. Again. Do you. Be unapologetically you. Work on yourself and praise yourself every step of the way. Selflove is key to breaking away from this toxic habit of searching for approval and validation from others.

Social media

This goes hand in hand with my previous point. If you post something or whatever else, whether other people see it or not, comment or not, etc, it shouldnt matter to you.

The other thing about social media, is it making you feel good about yourself or not, do you feel motivated and inspired or drained and negative. Watch your feelings closely when it comes to scrolling on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook, and decide for yourself whether continuing to spend endless hours scrolling is getting you where you want to be.

FOMO (Fear of missing out)

FOMO is an awful feeling and it is one of those things that can really weigh down on you. To get rid of FOMO I usually try to focus on doing something I enjoy or doing one of my tasks and convince myself that everything happens for a reason and that I don’t need them, I don’t need to be there with them, I am perfectly happy being by myself doing what I love.

Forgiveness

At some point, we have to let go of the past by forgiving those who’ve hurt us and by forgiving ourselves for the mistakes we made, after all, we are all flawed human beings and we all make mistakes. No one is perfect.

"Holding a grudge doesn't make you strong, it makes you bitter, forgiving doesn't make you weak, it sets you free". -Unknown

Set your mind to look for opportunities

Energy flows where attention goes. If you keep focusing on the thing that makes you feel trapped with no intention of finding your way out, you will most likely stay there. No one is going to save you. It is up to you to make a small shift and start to think about or see opportunities.

Step outside of your comfort zone to widen your vision. Opportunities are waiting for us at every corner, it is our job to identify them and then to take action.

Hobbies

Break away from all the stress and negative thoughts and emotions by doing something you love. Try to make time for yourself every single day. A hobby is a form of self-love.

Gratitude

I know everyone in the spiritual sense says to turn to gratitude, but I personally know that it isn’t always the easiest thing to do. We forget most times that we indeed have so many things to be grateful for. I suggest you have a small gratitude reminder that whenever you see it no matter what you’re going through that you will start to feel gratitude surfacing.

Also read:

7 ways to set yourself free

Live life in full bloom


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Today my blog reached a new milestone: 10 000 views 😀❤

I am grateful for every like, comment, share, and follower I receive. Your support means the world to me 🌍🙌

I hope you enjoyed reading this post and that you gained some value from it.

Much love and abundance, take good care

🌸🌸🌸

Thank you for joining me, feel free to share your thoughts

🌸🌸🌸

Beauty

First of all, happy international womens day💕
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What Makes A Woman Beautiful? · Evie Magazine

2-6% of women describe themselves as beautiful (according to research)

Isn’t it just heartbreaking to know so many women don’t see themselves as beautiful?

If you are one to doubt your self beauty or don’t feel beautiful or attractive, here are some ways to change and/or improve it.

🌺Feel comfortable/ sexy/ confident with what you are wearing, if you are feeling self-conscious about something about your outfit, change it because your insecurity/self-consciousness will be felt by others.

🌺Know that you are beautiful. You are unmistakeably and breathtakingly beautiful and you should not even for a second doubt it. You were put here on earth by God/ the Universe, so why doubt your beauty when you were beautifully made with purpose?

🌺Smile. Smile more. Smile randomly. Smile at something stupid that someone said years ago. Smile at anything silly. Smile, just smile. In my eyes, there is nothing more beautiful than a genuine smile.

🌺This goes hand in hand with smiling, laugh. Laughter is healing, powerful and a great mood booster.

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🌺Do more of what you love.

Find hobbies. Journal, read paint, anything at all you find fulfilling. Go after what makes you happy and meaningful or even if you think it is pointless. Let me explain the pointless part, I have many hobbies I find pointless, that most likely won’t get me anywhere in life, but I keep on doing it, why? because it gets me into a flow state, ’cause I enjoy it and get satisfaction.

Doing what you love helps to connect you with your deeper self and will leave you appreciating and loving yourself more wich will automatically help you feel more beautiful.

🌺Positive self-affirmations. Trust me, they are powerful when it comes to reprogramming your mind.

🌺Never compare yourself to anyone, to models on media, your best friend, your worst enemy or even your sibling. You are your own kind of beautiful.

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🌺Practice gratitude.

🌺 Exercise, drink water, and eat something healthy. Your body is a temple, treat it as such.

I am not one to speak when it comes to eating healthy at all, believe me, I don’t eat anything that comes out of the ocean, I don’t eat most vegetables and I am big on my sugars. I even drink 4 sugars with my coffee, but I drink less coffee and more black sugarless tea to make up for it. I drink a glass of water when waking up sometimes. I excercise 1-3 times a month.

Basically I want to say that all the little things count. Find simple ways and start small.

🌺Wear red.

A study from researchers at the University of Rochester found women were considered more attractive when they were wearing red clothing. In another study out of Manchester University, red lips were shown to grab attention for an average of 7.3 seconds. No matter where you’re wearing it, looks like the color red will likely attract people to you and make you feel more confident, too.

I feel more fierce, more attractive, and confident when wearing red. Wearing red automatically boosts your confidence.

🌺Stand tall, straighten your back, do a power pose. It all builds confidence subconsciously.

🌺Take care of yourself. Do things that make you feel more beautiful and feminine. Make a DIY face mask, do your nails, cover it with an invisible coat even, have a long bubble bath with your favorite music in the background.

🌺Set goals and work towards them. Try achieving a simple goal each day.

🌺Practice self-love and self-acceptance in any way you know how.

It is time that you love and appreciate and believe in yourself. You are worthy of feeling beautiful. You are worthy of your own love. You are worthy just because you are you. You are enough. In fact, you are more than enough. You are amazing beyond compare.

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Thanks for reading and I hope you found something that resonated with you.

Much love and abundance. Stay awesome and keep improving🔥❤

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Most valuable lesson

What is the most valuable lesson that you have learned?

Mine is pretty much simple, though it took me loads of struggle to get to this conclusion…

Happiness is a choice

We all have a choice to be happy, we have the power to control how we see and go through life.

Happiness isn’t dependant on other people or on the things we want to achieve or have. Happiness can be altered by our thoughts. I don’t know what anyone’s going through, but I can tell you that living in the past for too long or worrying for the future isn’t all that healthy, especially when negativity is connected, which is usually the case.

We can choose to smile or to be sour. We can choose to accept our circumstances and work ourselves out of them or we can dwell over them, playing the victim and stay unhappy for as long as we like.


I would love to hear your most valuable/treasured lesson.

Please share a life lesson that is close to your heart with your fellow bloggers, you never know if someone might need your words, or simply comment it down below.

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Have an amazing day and spread love and abundance!💖

Why you should stop searching for love

You are probably here because you are single and let me guess, searching for love and trying to find The One, but let me tell you something…Needing to have something pushes it further and further away from you… Have you ever desperately searched for an item, throwing your whole place upside down only to find it when you have stopped searching? and in some cases, it was even right beneath your nose that whole time! So stop needing and searching to have a love life and you will find it.

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1. Being single is a gift

Yes, you read that correctly, it’s a gift. Don’t dread being single, enjoy it and see it as the process to love yourself, to become the best version of yourself, because when we make ourselves whole, we don’t need somebody else to make us happy, but rather only contribute to the happiness. Be a happy single person and just be. Maybe even see it as dating yourself.

Don’t let the gift rot in a lonely dark cupboard somewhere, instead use it. Use it to learn to be happy on your own. Appreciate it. Do things you love doing. I saw a quote that said; if single is a gift can I exchange it? Why would you want to exchange it? Can you truly be happy with someone else when you can’t even be happy on your own?

We attract people into our lives that are more or less the same as us. Have you realized you are almost a different person to each person? That some people bring out different sides. All those different qualities live inside you, and I believe that different people come into our lives to help us realize that those parts exist inside of us and it is what we do about it, do we suppress or enhance it. This goes for good and bad. If someone is constantly mean to you for no reason, maybe internally there is a battle of emotions going on, figure it out and work through it. What I mean to say here is, become the best version of yourself. Spiritually. Physically. Emotionally.

2. Energy flows where attention goes

If you focus on the good, you’ll attract and see more good. The same goes for the bad, if you see bad, you will only see and attract worse things. See it as a good thing to be single, as an opportunity to attract the perfect guy into your life that holds all the standards you have set out to get. Enjoy being single all you can and stop trying to find someone. The sooner you let go of your wants the sooner you’ll be rewarded. Rather spend your energy on yourself, turn every single negative into a positive.

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3.Act taken even if you are at the point of adopting eight kittens.

Have you ever been in a relationship and then suddenly more guys are after you than there were before you started dating? And when you are single, not that many guys approach you? Well, that is the thing, you are not focused on the other guys and that makes you more of a challenge. That energy you give out when you are committed should be given out as if you are committed to yourself, and once again not searching for someone. You’ll appear more attractive and what is more attractive than a woman who is happy and truly loves herself?

4. You’ll learn to value yourself more

The more time you spend with yourself, the more you will get to know yourself, the more you will love yourself and then finally the more you will have love to give to others. Love comes from within not from outside. You can change the world through learning to love yourself first, from the inside out. You are only as strong as your weakest link, isn’t that just so very true? How can you love a person so much but don’t like yourself as a person? Sorry to say, but you can only love a person as much as you love yourself, otherwise I believe that person is only your way to escape from reality.

With self-love comes more value and higher standards and that is a good thing. Don’t let anyone ever tell you that it is bad to have high standards cause you will never find someone. I am not saying put a high standard on every little detail, I’m saying, know what you want and wait for it without looking too hard for it.

🌸So my message is basically to just love yourself and let love come find you while you are busy becoming the best version of yourself🌸

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🌸🌸🌸
Check out her blog, she’ll leave you satisfied
School Of Universal Life

Bonus

Check out this link below and find your self-love language to take care of yourself in the best way possible. It’s life changing that you won’t regret.

https://pin.it/2F5cDwm

Check out my very first blog post:

What it means to truly love yourself

Loving yourself? What does that mean and how do you even do it? Let me tell you, it is quite simple; it means that you are in a relationship, but the only difference is that it is a relationship with yourself. Loving yourself means to be the best for yourself, and to push yourself to become a better version of yourself every single day. Putting in the time, love, and care as you would in any other relationship, committing ourselves to ourselves like never before.

Loving yourself means becoming your own best friend and partner. You wish only the best for your partner or friends, right? Start wishing the best for yourself. Start seeing your true worth and let life align with your worth and standards. I’m not saying that you should let all your friends and your partner go to play that role, no, you can start to play that role without diminishing any friendships and relationships. Start being there for yourself, isn’t that what love is? To support, care, cherish, appreciate, and spending time with someone, to protect and motivate, to help someone back on the right path, and all these million little things. Everyone defines love differently, but I view it as these little things that add up into love.

We give our love and time away so easily, without keeping some of our love for ourselves. Let me tell you, the more love you put into yourself, the more love you will get to give away.

This is a simple statement, yet a bit harder to accomplish, which begs the question; How to fall in love with myself? How do I love me?
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1. Prioritize yourself


Spend time alone….with yourself of course 😉 Put yourself first, even if it’s just for a little while. Learn to love yourself without the love of others. Take yourself out on a date, have fun, learn a new hobby, or continue doing something you hadn’t done in a long time.

Do something that makes the world around you disappear. Journal, meditate, take a long warm bubble bath surrounded with scented candles. Treat yourself.


🌸Avoid negative self-talk and replace it with positivity and motivation and most importantly, love.
🌸The key is being…Just be in the moment, don’t dwell on the past, and don’t think too much ahead
🌸If any emotions suddenly arise, don’t push them back down, feel them, work through them and accept them, see it as a good thing to feel those emotions.
🌸BE GRATEFUL- this is so important to work into every day of your life, I can’t stress enough how powerful and necessary true gratefulness is in your life. In fact, make it a point to concentrate on at least 5 things you are grateful for daily.

Make a gratitude journal and give thanks daily, I talk from personal experience when I say it is life-changing. And if you’re into law of attraction and manifestation and that kind like things, you’ll really not regret being grateful.

2. Grow


Set goals, have dreams, and work on yourself. Loving yourself means looking in the mirror and liking what you see, while still wanting to look good/better for yourself, not only physically but mentally and spiritually too. Beauty goes beyond the surface.

It is so important for you to motivate yourself to accomplish your goals for you. You want the best for you, don’t you? Grow in any way possible. Become the best version of yourself.
🌸Read, journal, meditate… I know I’ve mentioned this before, but it’s so powerful in understanding who you are and growing to the person you want to become.
🌸Eat and live healthier… No, I’m not saying punish yourself into a diet you don’t want to do and drinking 10 glasses of water every day, I’m saying that you should do something bit by bit.
🌸Yoga, gym, or exercise, even if it’s just for a quick 5 minutes a week. Take a walk, or do whatever makes your heart race a bit faster and makes your body feel better and energized.
🌸Take care of your environment. Look around you, whether you are in your room at work or whatever, are you happy with what you see? Do you like the space around you and the feeling that comes with it? If not, do something about it! Clean the space. Fill it with colors that give you positive vibes. Is there any dust, get rid of it. Cluster? Take it to another space where it won’t bother you. Do you get my flow? Have an environment where you can thrive, where you always feel good and motivated.
-Do yourself a favor and do research on Fung Shui- Purplelotusyoga.com

3. Do what you love


Find your passion, follow it, work on it, and just have fun. If something makes you happy, do more of it. If you like meeting new people, go out and meet new people. If you like dancing, take dancing lessons. Drawing, draw. Singing, sing. Just have fun.

Bored? play loud music and dance with every fiber in your body like no one is watching. Enjoy yourself more often, laugh at yourself when you do something stupid and silly, like slipping on a wet floor, like hitting your toe against furniture, or accidentally breaking glass; truly laugh through the pain and you’ll feel better almost instantly, besides it’ll program you into not taking life so seriously all the time.

DID YOU KNOW, your brain kills a thought after 5 SECONDS… Do you ever have a thought or a sudden need to do something like write or draw or whatever it may be, and then you convince yourself to not do it? That’s exactly what I mean. If you ever have an urge to do something, anything at all (that you will benefit from, or something you know you should be doing) just do it, don’t waste another second thinking of reasons of why not to. I’m not in the mood maybe later, or whatever negative thought you have is your brain killing the idea. Don’t let it get to that, if you have a sudden urge, go for it!

4. Don’t ever criticize yourself


~Stop fighting yourself and start fighting for yourself~
Change the way you see yourself, replace every negative thought with a positive one. If you catch yourself saying something bad about yourself,  turn it into a good saying and add two more good things to say about yourself.
For example: Take- I am ugly… Replace with something like- I am truly unique and beautiful in my own way. My inner and outer beauty doesn’t go unnoticed. I am looking better and better every day.

Are you beating yourself up for not committing to your goals? For procrastinating? For never doing what you set yourself out to do? Stop beating yourself up, instead find the inspiration and motivation to finally do it. Usually, we procrastinate because we connect negative emotions to the goal or thing we must complete, become aware of the energy and thought you have towards it, and change the emotions and meanings and even the believes connected to it. Once again, change your environment to motivate or in a sense help you to start with that goal.

The real reason we procrastinate by Andrew Curby

5. Rid of toxic people


Love yourself enough to stay away from toxic people who carry bad energy that has a negative effect on you. If something or in this case, someone in your life doesn’t serve you, let it go. I know, it isn’t always the easiest but in a few weeks or months, you’ll be thankful that you made the change.

6. Smile


There is so much power in a genuine smile, just sit and smile for a few minutes and let good thoughts like good memories, gratitude, and love fill your heart. It helps you to be positive more often. If something goes wrong, take a deep breath in and a deep breath out and just smile, telling yourself that it’s okay, and the world isn’t ending because of it.

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~I hope that this was helpful, have an amazing day and remeber that you are worthy of your own love❤🤗🌸

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