How To Overcome Self-Doubt

Self-doubt is a thieve, it always has been and it always will be if we keep allowing it to be.

We all experience self-doubt at one point and some of us choose to thrive beyond it and others choose to get overwhelmed by it.

The problem with self-doubt is that we give into it for long, and it clouds our judgment and holds us back. We allow it more power over us than we ever should.

Recently I’ve been doubting myself and felt discouraged because of it. My usual self-esteem was nowhere to be seen. I am not one to doubt myself easily, but it crept up on me and I struggled to shake the feeling.

What made me doubt myself? Going through Pinterest and trying to find ways to better this blog I came across multiple bloggers who claim to make 6-7 figures from blogging a year or make $1 000’s a month, and I started to compare myself and my earnings to these standards and started to feel like such a huge failure.

We should learn to redirect our self-doubt, trust in the process, trust in ourselves, keep pushing forward, and not compare ourselves to others. We should learn to build our self-esteem.

I know that so many people doubt themselves, and I hope that this post will help change that. I hope this post can motivate you, inspire you, and build confidence in yourself.

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What is Self-Doubt

Self-doubt put simply is a lack of confidence, trust, and certainty in your abilities.

The Vibration of Self-Doubt

As you can see, feeling doubt is one of the lower vibrations.

Energy flows where attention goes. The more you focus on doubt the more the things you don’t want will find a way to manifest into your life.

And the more you focus on the doubt you feel, the more you will reaffirm to yourself that you are unworthy or incapable or not good enough.

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The Healthy Side of Self-Doubt

There is always a good side to negative emotions/circumstances. Experiencing doubt is normal and even needed sometimes.

https://mymoodpath.com/en/magazin/self-doubt/

What’s your level of self-doubt?

https://www.berkeleywellbeing.com/self-doubt.html
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🌸Comparing ourselves to others🌸

It is so easy to compare ourselves and our progress to other people and their progress. We compare ourselves to them in such a negative way that we begin to get discouraged and want to give up on whatever we’re doing.

Social media gives us easy access to amazing people to whom we compare ourselves without a second thought. We look at all they have achieved and try to compete with hundreds and even thousands of people. This is a fast track to doubting yourself.

Thank you CattleCapers for your contribution.

3 Levels of self-comparison

🌸Having expectations for a certain outcome🌸

We put so much pressure on ourselves to get to a certain outcome. We become disappointed and discouraged when we don’t achieve a certain level of success in a certain amount of time.

🌸Imposter Syndrome🌸

Imposter syndrome is that small voice that tells you that you are a fraud, that questions your credibility for doing things, and makes you feel undeserving of your achieved successes. 

🌸Questioning our abilities/thoughts/beliefs🌸

Usually, when we experience a change in mindset we start to question the path we’re on and our actions and influences on it.

This may not always be a bad thing, but it can lead to self-doubt.

🌸Important people who are negative🌸

We sometimes value the opinions of people close to us over our own, or we start to question whether our own thoughts are valuable.

🌸Encountering setbacks/obstacles🌸

When things don’t turn out the way we had hoped we tend to become negative and let doubt seep into our core.

Feeling stuck is also another gateway to self-doubt.

Self-doubt is a Thieve

Self-doubt steals from us because we allow it to. It keeps us from moving forward and can even cause us to go backward. It steals our confidence, our trust in our abilities, our trust in God/The Universe, and our trust in the path we have chosen for ourselves.

So many people of greatness, people who have achieved and created amazing things have experienced doubt and imposter syndrome before, but they didn’t allow it to stop them, and you shouldn’t either.

Let’s say that you continue to doubt yourself and throw all your goals and already achieved accomplishments in the dustbin. Where would you be in a week from now? still doubting whether you are worthy… In a month from now? wanting to go back, try again, but still doubting yourself… In a year from now? most likely full of regret. Ten years from now? maybe you’ll wonder why you were so caught up in your thoughts and didn’t just hold on a little longer and push through to see where it might’ve led you.

Doubting ourselves is to put ourselves on a path of regret and what-ifs, rather than lessons learned and successes gained.

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How to Eliminate Self-Doubt

I overcame my self-doubt by reminding myself to simply take the next step and not look at the whole staircase and trusting that I am getting to my destination at my own time and speed and that I have nothing to rush, nothing to worry about, and no one to compare myself with.

🌸Whatever you are in doubt of, continue doing it anyways🌸

Push through. Keep on taking the necessary actions, even when you are in doubt. Don’t allow doubt to hold you back.

“If you hear a voice within you say you cannot paint, then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced.”

– Vincent Van Gogh

🌸Strenghten your self-esteem and confidence🌸

Self-doubt is most likely caused by your lack of self-esteem and confidence, therefore it is your job to build it back up again.

  • Use positive self-talk. Be kind and encouraging to yourself. Talk to yourself with love and compassion.
  • Affirmations and Incantations.
  • Focus on your strengths.
  • Build up your knowledge and experience related to what you want to achieve.
  • Do more of what you love.
  • Try something new, step outside of your comfort zone.

Confidence is a skill

🌸Reevaluate your self-worth🌸

Your sense of self-worthiness shouldn’t increase or decrease by external factors like achievements or the opinions of others.

You are worthy simply because. And if you don’t believe that, it is time for a change in your mindset and beliefs.

Understand your worth

This also means to not compare yourself to others.

🌸Gain new insights🌸

Look for things and action steps that you can improve upon to have a better experience and outcome.

Find new insights, do some research, and you may find yourself discovering vital pivot points that will give you the necessary push in the right direction.

You can even ask someone you trust for help or honest insights.

🌸Journal🌸

Some journal questions for you:

  • What made you start in the first place?
  • Why did you keep doing it for so long?
  • What have you achieved so far?
  • Are you proud of how far you’ve come?
  • Do you still enjoy doing it?
  • What makes you doubt yourself?… why is this?
  • Would it be worth it to stop now and let doubt have the upper hand?
  • What would happen if you fail?
  • How do you define success

🌸Meditation and breathwork🌸

Meditation helps us look within and reevaluate our mindset and thoughts in a nonjudgemental way.

Breathwork is also great for clearing the mind and taking a step back.

🌸Trust the Process🌸

You’ve already come so far, why stop now? Put a little trust in yourself, believe that you are exactly where you are meant to be and that great things are yet to come.

Learn to trust and keep a positive and open mindset. Learn to trust your abilities and your own path and realize that everything happens as it should. We try too much to control everything, instead, we should let go a little, live a little and put a whole lot of faith and trust in the Universe/God.

🌸Turn to Gratitude🌸

There is always something to be grateful for. Always. Sometimes it is just a little harder to find those things or to be truly grateful. Turning to gratitude is the fastest way to reform your life and help you take the right steps forward with the right mindset.

The power of Gratitude

🌸Take a small break and have a good nights rest and start with a fresh and clear mind🌸

Go to bed and remind yourself that the following day is a new day and a new opportunity to do better. Start your morning with the determination to keep pushing forward.

How you start your morning determines how your day goes

Breaks are necessary for survival

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Inspiring Quotes on Self Doubt

Turning Pain Into Purpose

We all experience pain at some point in our lives. And we have a choice to make; we can either choose to let it consume us and make us bitter at heart or we can choose to turn our pain into something beautiful and meaningful. Pain is without saying an awful feeling, but it is what we choose to do with it that matters.

I created this post to help you through current and past traumas. This post was inspired by Nadia, you will find more about her in this post.

We always have the opportunity to turn any emotion into a form of art.

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How to turn your pain into purpose

Note: Most of these things are easier said than done, but doing it will bring a positive change.

💕Allow yourself to feel

If you want to cry, cry. Let it all out. There is no point in collecting the pain and holding on to it, suppressing it will only turn it into hate and anger that will be directed at the wrong people/things. Just make sure you don’t stay in that depressing place when allowing yourself to completely feel the pain.

💕Try to focus on the solution and not the problem

So now you’ve felt the pain completely, now what? It is time to start moving forward, to find the beauty in all these experiences. Give a meaning to it that will help you move forward positively.

Meanings like: everything happens for a reason; this will make me wiser and stronger; this will help me in future struggles; God/The Universe or whatever you may believe in is preparing you for a happy life etc.

One of the best things that helped me grow recently is to look at my bad memories and finding the good in them. Looking at the person who hurt me, and to remember what I admired in them and still do. To look at the person who hurt me, and feeling grateful for the good and bad, for the bad has made me much wiser and stronger. In the end, the bad wasn’t bad, it was a stepping stone to greatness.

💕Passion/Hobbies

This is a great place to start. Pain is a powerful emotion, and when it is directed to doing things you love doing, the beauty becomes amplified. Focus on doing things that bring you joy and happiness.

💕 It’s about creating the future you deserve

Stop looking back if it causes you more pain.

You are the creator of your own future. Create a life you love. You deserve to live a long, happy, and fulfilled life. Never accept anything less than you deserve.

Who is your ideal self? answer this and work towards that ideal version of you.

💕Set yourself free

You deserve to be free from everything that weighs you down, whether it is the past, pain, grief, hate, etc. you owe it to yourself to be happy.

💕Gratitude

Turning to gratitude is the fastest way to feel better and turn your pain into purpose, for there is always something to be grateful for, sometimes it only takes a bit more effort to find it.

The power of Gratitude

Quotes

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A woman of strength

Nadia Ngcobo (19)

Nadia is the beautiful young lady who inspired todays post. She is truly a remarkable woman. She is kindhearted and passionate, she spreads goodness and empowerement wherever she goes. She has learnt to put her pain towards good.

She speaks at schools and tries to relate to the stories she hears and tries to help people realize that there is a lot that can come out of pain. She tries to empower these students, as well as contribute sanitary pads, school uniforms, cosmetics, etc. by gaining sponsorships and donations.

Her mother physically and emotionally abused her and even deprived her of food. When she was finally taken into custody she learned how to turn her pain into art; by writing and speaking and helping others. She strives to be a better person than her mother was.

Not too long ago she was also sexually harassed and is still working through some emotions. Thank you Nadia for being so strong, and able to share the terrible things that have happened to you, and to still treat people with kindness and love.

Nadia has already accomplished quite a few things in her life. She was deputy head girl at her school. In 2019 she was South Africa Champion in Afrikaans speakers (redenaars) which is an amazing accomplishment. Like I’ve said before, she speaks at schools, contributes to them physically and mentally. Nadia is destined for greatness.

Nadia’s contribution to Youth Day 2021 South Africa

Something extra: This speech landed her a job offer

Here is the Audio from the Voice Of the Community Radio if you would prefer listening to her speak.

THE YOUTH OF TODAY VERSUS THE YOUTH OF 1976

They were bruised, battered, killed and they rioted, fighting for education. 45 years later, was the uprising worth the lives of the youth of 1976, or has their struggle gone down the drain as the youth of today plunges on resources bringing about negative change?

If the mandate was education, why do we still have schools lacking basic infrastructure and study material? We have an education system that focuses more on the theory of things rather than skills that will equip the youth for the outside world ensuring that they are independent and not dependent on foreign manipulated companies.

If education is important, why do we have so many graduates sitting at home because they do not meet the ridiculous job experience requirements and lack employment opportunities? What message are we bringing across to the young ones that are yet to go to university? Universities that financially excluded students because of their historical debts while they have millions sitting in their bank accounts. Is the South African education system still colonized or is its independence constantly being altered to accommodate the standards of the youth? I mean we went from a 50% pass rate to a 30% pass rate that’s a decline in the progression of our education.

With an unemployment rate of 16,9% in 1976 and an increase to 28,48% in 2020, have we progressed or are we going backward as a country with a laid-back youth? What happened to the spirit of Soweto Uprising martyrs? What happened to the fight for quality education? Why can’t we fight for our rights as we fight for Gender-Based Violence, Fees Must Fall, and the acceptance of the LGBQTI+ community? 

We commit crimes because of unemployment. We live in a society where politicians bathe in corruption and take pride in racketeering. How then do we complain about the 0.7% increase in contact crimes? How then do we continue with an increase in youth pregnancies when we have so many pregnancy preventative methods put in place to control the birth rate? Do we care more about our sexual urges or are we breaking the cycle of raising children in dysfunctional and financially struggling households? We prefer graduating in the form of a child rather than in the form of an academic degree. We live off social grants instead of contributing towards social grants.

Is there anything that the youth of today can show the youth of 1976 for their fight towards where we are today? What is freedom if our minds are still enslaved by colonization? Where is the progression? We are not the tomorrow of this country, we are the today, the now of South Africa. When will we wake up and smell the coffee? When will use the South African Youth council to our advantage? How many seats do we occupy in the Parliament? When will we have our own uprising towards unemployment, education, and the history of our country and continent? 

We as the youth should benefit from government set-asides in government procurement. Let enterprises get contracts if they can prove that 25% of their employees are youth. Let the Government develop legislation that will ensure that the private sector procures 50% of its goods from the youth and local enterprises.

As a young person of South Africa, I want to participate in the value chain. I want to have a say in matters that include me.

Can the youth not venture into agriculture without an increase in farm murders? In March 2021, farm murders increased to 35 from 22. When noble laureate Desmond Tutu called us a rainbow nation it was in reference to the diversity in our country and our ability to perhaps one day live in interracial harmony where colour is just colour. Where colour is not a privilege to some and a crime to others. We kill the very farmers that we want to supply us with local organic vegetables and livestock. We kill the very framers that contribute a lot to this country’s agriculture.  

When I look at my fellow peers, I see future Vusi Themekwayo(s), future Ludwick Marishane(s), I see future Addi Pienaar(s) because we have the potential to be far more than what we’re settling for. We’re too comfortable in poverty. We’re too comfortable with this education. We’re too comfortable with racism. We’re too comfortable in being uncomfortable.

I don’t know you but I’m emancipating myself from colonial mental slavery, racism, corruption, Gender-Based Violence, a colonially influenced education system and I’m creating employment opportunities for myself and the future generation. I am emancipating myself from a country that’s taking one step forward and ten steps backward. I am not the tomorrow of South Africa, I am the today of South Africa. I am the now of South Africa.  I am South Africa.

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Questions to Nadia

What are your hobbies?

I crochet, knit, write and sing.

What is the one thing you look forward to when you wake up?

I look forward to talking to My Love, hearing him tell me how his day is and how much he loves me. I look forward to praying with him, for him, and our families. I look forward to laughing with him. I look forward to growing with him

Favorite colour: Black

Favorite song: Best Part

Favorite author: John Green

Favorite food: Mcdonalds burger

Favorite snack: Doritos

Favorite poem: I rise by Maya Angelo

Favorite person: Jean-Pierre (my boyfriend)

What are your three favorite books?

  • A fault in our stars
  • The Great Gatsby
  • Bear The Blessers Game

How do you define success?

Success is being contented with what you have because you worked hard for it. Success is Love. Success is Happiness and Success is Hope.

What fuels your passion?

Pain. Whatever pain I go through I turn it into something positive and also art. My mother and I aren’t close so the pain she brings me drives me to the better.

What do you want to be?

I want to do Law and become a Human rights lawyer. I have been sexually harassed multiple times so I want to fight for those that cannot fight for themselves.

Who do you look up to the most and why?

Myself. I’ve never met anyone as strong as me so I look up to the person I was yesterday because the person I was yesterday drives me to become a better person today.

My mother never encouraged me to do anything, and she was always against anything I did, so I decided that I am not even going to impress her and I am going to prove myself right. I am going to prove to myself that I am the woman who I say I am. That I am a fountain of grace, strength, and prayer. I don’t work to prove anyone wrong, I work to prove myself right.

Make yourself proud

What inspires and motivates you?

My mother’s inability to love me. Pain and will to be everything that my mother isn’t.

What do you believe in and try to promote?

Responsible citizenship and being the Voice of The Oppressed.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

I see myself as a UN speaker representing those that are oppressed by the justice system and men.

How would you describe yourself?

Bold and unapologetic.

5 things you are grateful for

  • Life
  • Family
  • Love
  • Peace
  • Freedom of expression

Do you love yourself?

Yes, I do, to love someone else I need to love myself first.

Would you describe yourself as a confident person?

Yes, I rise above everything with my head held high.

Your best tip on self-love and confidence

Don’t let anyone tell you what you can and cannot be. Never do things to impress people there don’t prove work to prove them wrong, work to prove yourself right.

If you had one year left to live, what would you do?

I would enrich more lives and appreciate the ones I love more.

Do you have any regrets?

Yes. When I got sexually harassed, and my boyfriend warned me but I didn’t listen, if I had listened I wouldn’t have gotten harassed

What are the things you wish to experience and learn about?

I want to experience the love of a mother and learn to forgive and let go of things I cannot control.


What do you think makes life meaningful?

Letting go of the past, living in the present, and looking forward to the future.

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A written piece by Nadia

With tears falling from the corner of her eyes and voice screaming from deep within her soul, he pressed hard against her pride, soul ties that were awaiting marriage, and bold eyes which dug deeper into her soul as she begged for mercy from a merciless cologne infused her purity, silenced her cry and diminished her smile. Even with her eyes closed, she can still see the callous smirk that was once disguised as a courteous young gent raised by an African mother and breastfed by her pain. She felt her insides go numb as her body laid still. Her closed opening burn but the fluids meant to protect her leisurely watching like a wounded activist, stained robes which used to be whiter than the finest grains of virgin snow. Still.. from screaming until her veins mapped the road to Eden, from her hands scratching and pushing to her legs kicking and frozen she went still… for the only voice she had left, was the polluted river whose flows flowed like stretchmarks mapped like the roots of a fruitful apple tree. And even though the sheets were left scarred by a virgin’s cry for mercy. Like the color of her skin, it was her destiny just as it was her ancestors’.


Thank you Nadia for sharing your authentic self 🦋

Can you relate to turning your pain into passion?

Hope you took some value from this post.

Much love and abundance

🙏❤

Doing what is best for you

You should respect yourself enough to be able to do what is best for you.

You will live a much more happy and fulfilled life once you start doing what is best for you.

Doing what is best for you means to make decisions that will benefit you, and make you feel better about who you are. Stop feeling bad for wanting to put yourself first, you may not see it as I do, but you are way more important for you to look after than anybody else, and the more you look after yourself, the more capable of looking after others you become.

Do what is best for you so that you can become your very best version.

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How you can do what is best for you

👣Use your time and energy wisely

Something bad, but minor just happened, do you spend hours ranting, complaining, or feeling mad about it? Is it serving you to feel this way? You could have used all that time and bad energy and put it towards something better.

👣Goals

You probably have goals, work on achieving them.

If you don’t have goals, get out a piece of paper and think about what it is you want.

Where is it getting you to not work on your goals? Where could you have been if only you did what you wanted to do. Start now and stop waiting.

👣Stop the people pleasing act

There lies great value in helping people, but there also lies attachment to gaining validation. The moment you want to help a person to feed your ego, you are people pleasing.

👣Do what you have to do until you can do what you want to

Make sure you dont procrastinate doing tasks to a point where they are completely delayed or incomplete.

Get your grind on and take care of all your responsibilities

👣Adopt a Growth mindset

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👣Watch out for toxic/unexceptable relationships/behavior

The longer you stay in something that is not good for you, the harder it will be to let go.

Inconsistent behavior and flakiness are poor foundations for a relationship, and suggest a lack of respect. Self-respecting people have no time for those who waste their time.

They also refuse to tolerate any kind of abuse or poor treatment.
http://powerfulmind.co/start-doing-whats-best-for-you/

👣Live a healthy lifestyle

You have probably heard these things a million times, but its because it is the truth:

  • Exercise regularly
  • Drink water
  • Keep a water bottle while you work on something
  • Keep your environment clean
  • Have house plants, or an air purifier
  • ect.

👣Understand your worth

You should know your value. You should know whether someone is worthy of spending time with you. I am saying to do this in a humbling manner, it is more about spending your time with people who are worth it.

👣Find work you love and give it your all

Okay, we are still in the middle of a pandemic and jobs are being lost day by day and it becomes harder to keep a job never mind getting a new one, but I believe you can still do other things you are passionate about and turn it into your job over time.

With the right mindset, enough willpower, dedication, and passion you can make anything work.

👣Do the right thing

You will feel better about yourself for standing up for what you believe in or protecting someone when being wronged or even for rather telling the truth than lying. This will help you build your self-worth and self-respect.

👣Try to avoid gossip

I enjoy gossip, but I’ve seen what negative effects it can have both internally and externally. If you want to do what is best for you, you will commit to better conversation and stay away from mindless gossip.

Do you feel good after gossiping, after dragging someone’s name through the mud?

👣Fomo-fear of missing out

When experiencing FOMO, and you decided to miss out on a party or event because you have things you have or want to do, remember your reasons. Whatever you are doing is probably much worth than hours spent talking nonsense and being somewhere that will get you nowhere. You are missing out for a reason, and why see it as missing out when you chose to do something more worth your time.

👣Embrace making changes

When something doesn’t feel right, or if something no longer serves you, embrace making changes.

👣Make yourself proud

👣What it means to truly love yourself

👣Set yourself free

👣Live life in full bloom

👣How you start your morning determines how your day goes

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Poem– I have to do what’s best for me

Our connection is something devine

so I stuck by your side for the longest time

aware of the path that is full of self distruction

but oh, how can you say no to the sweet seduction

~

You gave me a one year trial

I know now where ‘us’ would lead

I’ve known months ago, but I was in denial

For the last time, my heart shall bleed

~

You were all I ever wanted

but your inconsistant behavior made me fix my vision

a journey of self-love and development has started

I had made my final decision

~

I have to give up on us, for me

No longer will I be

trapped in an unwanted reality

Now I finally see

I have to do what’s best for me

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Quotes:


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I hope you enjoyed this post, feel free to share any experiences, thoughts, or anything random with me in the comment section.

Sending some love and abundance to you on this beautiful Saturday!

Thank you for visiting 😉❤

Set yourself free

🌸🌸🌸

Today I came here bringing you a message -to set yourself free- so that you can go forth happily, thriving, and inspired.

Do you feel trapped by your circumstances, emotions, thoughts, and by the people around you?

Guess what?! so do most of us, but the good thing is that we have the capabilities to set ourselves free, but first we must decide to set ourselves free or continue to feel drained and caged in with nowhere to go. The truth is that happiness is a choice, and happiness also comes with being authentic and free.

Set yourself free from everything holding you back, from your negative beliefs/thoughts, from the past, from self-doubt, from anything that no longer serves you.

k.tolnoe

How to set yourself free

Take a step back, and breath

Sometimes a break and a change of perspective are all we need to continue forward. Start seeing your challenges as opportunities for growth.

Get clear on who you are, who you want to become, and what you expect out of life.

Awarness is always key!

Take out a journal and jot everything down, and be truly honest with yourself. Figure out who you are, what your values are, what will bring you more happiness, what do you stand for, what will fuel your passion, what you can do to better your life, etc.

Don’t obsess over results

Focusing on goals can become a problem because it makes us prisoners of those goals, and we only laser-focus on results. By focusing on developing the right habits, i.e., on processes, it becomes easy for us to do the things necessary for living an awesome life.

Focus on developing the right habits and to set yourself free from being obsessed with results!

One Percent Better Team

In short, become progress/habit orientated instead of result orientated.

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Get clear on your goals and vision

By knowing your goals, you can live your life accordingly Working towards something that you want to achieve for yourself will make you a lot more fulfilled and happy and make you feel less trapped or lost.

Perfection is an illusion

Stop striving for ultimate perfection, there is no such thing. By trying to be too perfect you will start to lose interest and motivation and go into a spiral of self-critique.

Push through

Sometimes the only thing we can do is keep our mouths shut and push through. In a way, this is also stepping outside of your comfort zone because you are doing something that you don’t necessarily want to do but most probably have to do.

Authenticity ~ Be your true self

Be you and do you. You don’t have to put on a fake facade to please others, the only person you need to please is you. Embrace your imperfections.

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Work on yourself

Learn to love the person you are while working on becoming your ideal version of yourself.

Stop seeking outer validation and approval

Seeking approval from others is a path of destruction. Why do we seek approval though? because of low self-esteem, because we are mean to ourselves and need others to validate our good characteristics.

Start approving of yourself. Again. Do you. Be unapologetically you. Work on yourself and praise yourself every step of the way. Selflove is key to breaking away from this toxic habit of searching for approval and validation from others.

Social media

This goes hand in hand with my previous point. If you post something or whatever else, whether other people see it or not, comment or not, etc, it shouldnt matter to you.

The other thing about social media, is it making you feel good about yourself or not, do you feel motivated and inspired or drained and negative. Watch your feelings closely when it comes to scrolling on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook, and decide for yourself whether continuing to spend endless hours scrolling is getting you where you want to be.

FOMO (Fear of missing out)

FOMO is an awful feeling and it is one of those things that can really weigh down on you. To get rid of FOMO I usually try to focus on doing something I enjoy or doing one of my tasks and convince myself that everything happens for a reason and that I don’t need them, I don’t need to be there with them, I am perfectly happy being by myself doing what I love.

Forgiveness

At some point, we have to let go of the past by forgiving those who’ve hurt us and by forgiving ourselves for the mistakes we made, after all, we are all flawed human beings and we all make mistakes. No one is perfect.

"Holding a grudge doesn't make you strong, it makes you bitter, forgiving doesn't make you weak, it sets you free". -Unknown

Set your mind to look for opportunities

Energy flows where attention goes. If you keep focusing on the thing that makes you feel trapped with no intention of finding your way out, you will most likely stay there. No one is going to save you. It is up to you to make a small shift and start to think about or see opportunities.

Step outside of your comfort zone to widen your vision. Opportunities are waiting for us at every corner, it is our job to identify them and then to take action.

Hobbies

Break away from all the stress and negative thoughts and emotions by doing something you love. Try to make time for yourself every single day. A hobby is a form of self-love.

Gratitude

I know everyone in the spiritual sense says to turn to gratitude, but I personally know that it isn’t always the easiest thing to do. We forget most times that we indeed have so many things to be grateful for. I suggest you have a small gratitude reminder that whenever you see it no matter what you’re going through that you will start to feel gratitude surfacing.

Also read:

7 ways to set yourself free

Live life in full bloom


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Today my blog reached a new milestone: 10 000 views 😀❤

I am grateful for every like, comment, share, and follower I receive. Your support means the world to me 🌍🙌

I hope you enjoyed reading this post and that you gained some value from it.

Much love and abundance, take good care

🌸🌸🌸

Thank you for joining me, feel free to share your thoughts

🌸🌸🌸

Live life in full bloom

1st of September already! time surely flew by this year, or is it just me? There are only 4 months/124 days left before 2022

Today is officially Spring in South Africa (although it doesn’t quite feel like it yet), and I was looking for spring quotes and came across this one: Live life in full bloom. And immediately I felt inspired after having such a long day and felt the need to share.

What it means to live life in full bloom

Living life in full bloom means living with hope and purpose, with imagination and vision, in a way that honors the Earth, the spirit, and one another ~ Elizabeth Murray

I also see it as living life to the fullest, giving your all and your best, bringing happiness to yourself and others, doing what you love, and going after your wildest dreams.

How to live life in full bloom

I think the best way to live life in full bloom is by being/becoming our ideal selves. Think about it, your best self is most probably happy, energized, creative, passionate, loving, fun, and whatever it may be for you.

Becoming your ideal self is a concept I have recently started to take more seriously, it is a concept I believe everyone should understand. After all, we are either moving forward or moving backward. Embrace the glorious mess that you blend in so well with this concept because it means to fully accept yourself as you are while also working on yourself and becoming your best/ideal self.

🐾Prioritise what is important to you.

Do what makes you happy, and everything else will fall into place. 

🐾Put energy into your goals/hobbies

🐾Take more risks

You should make it a point to step outside of your comfort zone, it almost always guarantees growth.

🐾Show your appreciation to the ones you love.

🐾Be more present

Your past is important to learn from. Your future is important to work towards. Though the only thing that truly exists is now. You can practice gratitude and mindfulness to be more present.

🐾Get clear on who your ideal self is for you.

Do something today that brings you closer to that ideal version of you.

🐾Just do anything that makes your soul happy, joyous, calm, grateful, loved, etc.

🐾Today my teacher told me we have to have small things that bring us happiness, and it is very true. For me, it is reading, improving myself in one way or another, sitting outside on the grass, and drinking my favorite coffee.

How to re-energize your spirit when you feel drained

I felt drained these past few days and also heard classmates complain about the same thing, and this morning I was listening to a video where Abraham Hicks basically says that our emotions are our indicator for whether we are in harmony with who we are or whether we aren’t. It is our job to keep track of our negative emotions and work through them or make much-needed changes.

🦋 Find a way to unleash your inner child through something that brings you true joy, something that makes you smile brightly from the inside out.

🦋 Do some exercises, whether full on fitness or yoga, or even dancing, it doesn’t have to be a lot, just get your body moving.

🦋 Like I’ve mentioned before, gratitude! You can start a gratitude journal.

The power of Gratitude

🦋 Get a good night’s rest while listening to Subliminals/affirmations while you sleep.

🦋 Watch something inspirational/motivational or a comedy or watch a show that you’ve already seen but would totally watch it again.

🦋 Take a step back from everything that makes it feel as if it is weighing down on your shoulders, and shift your focus.


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Happy Spring!

It isn’t spring for everybody, so happy autumn too🍁

I hope you enjoyed this post

Much love and abundance 🙏❤

Spring quotes:

🦋🦋🦋

Your name has a frequency

I was today years old when I discovered our names have frequencies. It has a vibration. Our names hold energy!

And if our names have a frequency, that means all words we speak and think also have frequencies. And if accompanied by emotions that word becomes amplified… No wonder thoughts and spoken words have power.

This is also why the universe responds to spoken words.

For much more information on the frequency of your name, I suggest you view this: 

The Frequency Of Your Name

The Vibration And Energy Of Your Name

Our names hold so many truths about who we are and the potential we have to fulfill our dreams/desires/purpose/destiny.

We can determine our Life path, our Soul urge, and we can dive so much deeper just by using our names, as well as our birthdate.

*only adding the vowels of your name
Add your birth date numbers together

I hope you found something useful/interesting 🌸

Related question

Do you feel a difference when someone calls you by your name from your surname?

I have two names and then my surname; Karlien Jo-Anne Kruger. And I feel differently and respond differently depending on what a person calls me. Calling me Karlien makes me feel vulnerable in a sense with my walls down. And calling me Jo-Anne makes me feel slightly more guarded and or professional.

I also respond differently depending on how they use my names and on the nicknames I have.

This might all be in my head. So I would love to hear your viewings on this.

Nonrelated question:

Another question of my curiosity, and I do hope you give your opinion on this. You can take this in any direction you wish 👣

If you had the chance to experience it all over again. All the joy, all the love, everything, even though you would go through all the hurt, all the pain, all the hate. Would you do it? even though you would get the same ending good/bad?

Why fit in when you were born to stand out

Dr. Suess

Thank you for all the constant love and support! I am truly grateful🙏

May you have a blessed day

Much love and abundance

🙌❤

Why I don’t regret anything, ever

Well, this is an interesting topic, coming from a 17-year old that hasn’t even started living life completely on her own terms, but hear me out anyhow, I’ll keep it short and sweet.

I don’t regret anything, not past mistakes, past relationships, past actions, or even encounters.

Believe me, my face still gets red with embarrassment when I think about some past events, but I still don’t regret it, I wouldn’t want to change a thing.

And then there are times that I do regret my actions or words, but only for a short while. I quickly wash them off with these beliefs…

Three beliefs I have that keeps me from feeling regret:

🌸 The belief that everything happens for a reason.

Anything we experience has a reason behind it, even though we might not always see the reason right away. Only years later you discover that it made you stronger somehow, or that it changed your thinking for the better.

Life is designed to push us forward, and sometimes uses setbacks to launch us forward with greater might and speed.

🌸 The belief that I can’t change my past.

(however, I have the power to change my present and future)

It already happened, and it happened the way it did, and unless I build a time machine to travel back in time, there is no use fretting over what could have been or shouldn’t have been said or done.

🌸 The belief that I was acting/speaking accordingly to my emotions and thoughts at that time.

It’s only after doing, thinking, or saying certain things that we realize that we shouldn’t have said what we’ve said, think those thoughts, or act on our emotions in the way we did. Guess what, it’s too late now… yet we have the choice to be better.

If I had to go back in time and relive my life, I would do everything exactly the same, it made me into the woman I am becoming and into the young lady that I am.

Why regret something you have no power of changing?


I hope you enjoyed today’s post.

Much love and abundance. I hope you have a blessed day.

🙌❤

Please support my new book in progress on Wattpad.
Outfoxing The Billionaire
https://www.wattpad.com/story/275839661-outfoxing-the-billionaire
Lydia Lopez, a fine businesswoman working for her father hoping to take over the company soon.

Her father although, made some wrong choices with Edward Linn and now he is forced to ask his daughter to marry Edward’s grandson or lose everything.

Why is her father in debt with Edward?
Will Lydia give in and marry Emran? or fight and live on her own terms?
Will she get to keep and run the company?


Emran Linn, the all-mighty billionaire moving back to his hometown after 21 years. He made his own wealth in Europe, but it is time to take over from his grandfather.

What does Emran think of marriage with elegant, successful, and mysterious Lydia?
Would he want her after discovering her big secret, which she has been hiding for nine years?
Will he expose her? or better yet, blackmail her?

A beautiful soul

Colorful and bright

Love is always in sight

There is no limit to which extend

a simple act of kindness can spread

You are a beautiful soul,

leaving seeds of inspiration wherever you go

❤❤❤

It is with great pleasure that I share a talented, insightful, wise and amazing post about a sweet and beautiful soul that found me on WordPress. I felt that his comments were worth sharing.

Frederick, I am forever grateful that our paths crossed on this platform.

http://katiemiafrederick.wordpress.com/

Comment on Dreams of you

“Embrace the glorious mess that you are”

SMiLes Karlien that’s Very Profound You Know

What Would A Man Do Financially Independent

For The Rest of His Life already marrying the

Most Beautiful Woman For What He

Dreamed of All His Life

What Would Be

Left to Do

Except Paint

The Midnight Sky
Colors He’s Never Felt Before…

True Others Might Seek Intensities
of Physical Pleasures Alone in Novel
Ways of Life Yet What Life Teaches me Most

Is it is Reality

That is the

Dream

And Our Potential
to Paint the Midnight New
Moon Sky With Colors Never
Felt Before Yes True Even with
My Dream Girl at my Side Forevemorenow

For 33 Years i too am Haunted then by Dreams
of First Love Coming Back to me not Nearly As Beautiful
As Dream Woman Girl by my Side Yet Still A Dream Where

Life is Really

Dreamtime

only For

Ours to Paint
To Create At Essence
of What We Really Feel now
Awake or Asleep the Reality as
Real as Real Gets What We Feel and Sense now

Precipice of Heaven And Hell Loss and Gain Night
And Day Dark and Light Twilight Intense Where Hell

Meets

Heaven

In Life

For

It’s True

On A Roller Coaster
There’s Not Much Excitement
Traveling in Grey Scale Life with
No Rises or Falls to Color Midnight Skies

You See in School And In Work And Sadly At Home
As Well We are most Never Taught How to Master Dreamtime

Now True There is No ‘Morpheus’ At our Side Out of A ‘Matrix Movie’
to Unplug From What We Have Been Spoon-Fed in Deadlines of Making
Money and Things Life to Generate Our Own Colors of Nirvana And Bliss

Still to come Now

As Art Forms Generating

Essence Life Breathes New Now

So i looked Within And Found Still Seeking
Now Finding Answers in Free Flowing Words
of Free Verse Poetry And Yes Dreamtime in Dance
Steps in Public As 15,088 Miles of Meditating Moving
That In Flow and 9.4 MiLLioN Words Have come in 94 Months too

For What i’ve Come to Understand

Is Life is Order and Chaos Feather

Becomes Wind Where Random

And Faith in Now Meets Where

Lucid Waking Dreamtime

Becomes Ours

Navigating
Silent Pilot

Within

Soul

Letting

Go Coloring New

Painting Midnight

Skies Feather Floats
Wind in Broad Daylight Now

Feel How Vague The Shape of
This Reality Is Then Paint the Shape

Of Your

Reality

Yours

As of course

You Already do
Embracing the Chaos
And Making Order The Magic That comes Next

OBTW my Dreams of my First Love Ended When
i Became The Dream And Thanked Her for the Grief
That Helped me Bring Back my Soul When All Was Lost
in Hell for 66 Months What i Found is the ability to Find the

Deep Warmth

in Connecting

Love What

i Left Behind

When She Left me

And Didn’t Realize It Until

i finally Thanked Her And Let her go…

As i didn’t Realize What Was Still Holding

my Deeper Ability to Love Back All those Years

We May Believe in some ways that the 5 Percent
of Awareness We See And Think is Our Realities Most Yet that

Is only the Surface of Our Ocean We may Still Come to See and Be
Through Arts of HeART SPiRiT Soul We Dive Deeper than what we ‘think’…

And Of

Course

We Are All

Separate Oceans

Who Share the Same Dream

As Far As i Can And Will Dream For Now at Least..

SMiLes i Treasure All of Humanity Each Human Being

Another UNiVerSE of ‘God’ Yes Spirit Beyond Trademarks
to Explore my

FRiEnD No

Matter Form

Ocean

Deeper
Still to come
Golden Ages
Ever More Unfolding Souls…

Leaving All the Stuff And Money Behind…

if i had a Billion Dollars More i Will Discard
it like Dust in the Wind it is As my Weight Now
my Soul is Feather Greater Spirit Wind Coloring

HeART Free

Now

With

SMiLes..:)


The Hunchback of Notre Dame
The Phantom of the Opera
Frankenstein Without A Soul

Desperately

Wanting to

Be Human

These Are All Archetypes

of the Devil Lost in Hell Within

And True For 66 Months i Am All of Those

Most Everyone Turned Away

From Me Living In Hell

On Earth

And i Lost
All ability

to Feel the
Giving and Receiving
of Love in Life the Flame
Within That makes life worth living at all

Other than That Experiencing Type Two
Trigeminal Neuralgia The Worst Pain Known
to Humankind No Drug Would Touch For 66 Months Shut-in my
Bedroom From Wake to Sleep With A Synergy of 18 Other Life Threatening
Mostly Chronic to Acute Work-Stress Related Disorders From A Slow Burn Then

of 11 Years of Stress to Hell

All My Poetry

Started When

One Person

in A Crowd

of Coldness

Told me Thank You

For Being Me No Act

Of Kindness is too Small

To Change An Entire UniVerse

Of A Human Being ReNeWeD Free

You Are A Kind Human

Being in Crowds

Of Cold

Still

Lighting

Up New Colors on

Human Christmas Trees
SMiLes Dear Friend Public
Dancing i Hear the Words Famous
Legend and Hero commonly in Life

Yet Still

The Loudest

Thank You

i Still Hear

is From A Stranger In Hell…

It’s People Like You Who Have
The ability to Bring Strangers Back to Life…

Feel the Blessing You Are to Others Most…

i’ve Interacted With Thousands of People

in the Last 10 Years and 7 Months and Close
to 13 MiLLioN Words online i feel the Gems When they Touch

my Soul

And Make

A New Color
on my Christmas
Tree i Refuse to Take Down

Have A Beautiful Soul-lit

Coloring Day Dream on FRiEnD Free…

Thank You

For Being You

For You Are

A Dream Come
True Today to me..:)


http://katiemiafrederick.wordpress.com/

SMiLes Dear Karlien Most Everything i Write in my Blog
Is Simply A Copy And Paste of What Other Humans

Have inspired

Around the

Globe in the

Last 94 Months

Considering this Poem

Wouldn’t Exist Without

Inspiration of Yours Considering

That All my Poems are Gifts to those

Who Inspire my Soul In Other Words it

Belongs to You as Much as Me my FRiEnD

It Seems

The World

Would Be

A Nicer Place

if We Didn’t Try to
Own it So Much With

SMiLes hehe surely now

If We Feel We Are Enough Now

And are Complete All that’s Left to
Do is Give And Share Life Free mY FRiEnD

i am simply

Honored

That

You Welcome

me in Your Place
of Writing Life not

All Do i am Always

Surprised Actually when
Anyone Does Delightfully Yet this is
only My Heaven to Give and Share Free…

You Are Welcome to Do As You Please

With Any Art i Give and Share Free

All that i do

is A Finger

Print of Soul
Anyway with Smiles..

Shall We Own Foot Prints
on the Beach Not in my View
my FRiEnD Foot Prints Are For Others to Touch..:)


Comment on Silly game

http://katiemiafrederick.wordpress.com/

Are Feelings Best or Worst

Feelings Are Who We Are

Are Poems Worst or Best

Poems Are Who We Really Are

At

Best

At Least

When Home
Within Comes
Out to Dance Sing Free
Karlien Now With SMiLes..:)


http://katiemiafrederick.wordpress.com/

Dropping his URL for the fourth time now, I hope you see the beauty of his soul like I do.

Your guide to have more willpower

Defining willpower

According to most psychological scientists, willpower can be defined as: The ability to delay gratification, resisting short-term temptations in order to meet long-term goals. The capacity to override an unwanted thought, feeling, or impulse

What you need to know about willpower: The psychological science of self-control – American Psychological Association

Why should we have willpower?

Willpower can and should be strengthened. I see willpower as the same thing as self-discipline. We should lead a disciplined life to achieve our goals and keep up with high standards.

We should learn to push ourselves. To step outside of our comfort zone. To do the things we don’t want to when we know it will benefit us in some way by doing it.

Their lies power in doing one thing completely, with a 100% effort. With complete willpower. How you do one thing is how you do everything, meaning that if you delay something small or a simple task, do it half or complain about it, how are you expecting not to take that same half effort and complaints with you when it comes to bigger tasks and priorities.

Do the small things with total willpower and it will be transferred to how you handle the rest of your goals.

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Habits to have more willpower

We use willpower over and over again and eventually, we make it a habit

One simple task I want you to do first thing in the morning when you get out of bed is to make the bed. Don’t just lazily throw the covers close and put the pillow in place. Make sure the duvets are smooth and pulled on correctly. Put in some effort in making your bed. Do this every single day and notice the difference it can make on the rest of your day and how you take on tasks.

Exercise. As simple as that. Schedule a 5-60 minute workout at least twice a weak. When it is time to exercise, don’t procrastinate. Just go do it.

Focus on one task at a time. Emerce yourself into doing one task until it’s done. Don’t have three different things to do and try to multitask, it will take more time and energy than needed.

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Create a Reward System. Every time you completed a goal and did so fully, reward yourself with something small.

Set realistic and attainable goals. Ever heard of SMART goals?

When taking on a goal/task, use Positive self-talk, Affirmations, and Encouraging words and motivate yourself and just do it. Do it for you. Set new standards of what kind of person you are and be that person, improve that person every single day. Be the best version of you, for you.

Stick to your plan, nothing stops willpower like changing your goals and plans for no actual good reason. If you said you were going to do this at this time, go do it! It will strengthen your willpower. By changing your plan unnecessarily, you are telling your brain that it is okay to procrastinate and willpower by now has already packed its bags.

This may seem obvious but get enough sleep. Your willpower will be very low when you are tired. Unless you are like me, that at a certain stage of tiredness you get energized and more focused. Just don’t overdo it.

Get up early, has improved my willpower tremendously, I am more awake, more aware, had just the right amount of sleep, and am ready to take on the day fully.

Define and remember your ‘Why’ it’s important to know why you want to have more willpower, why you want to complete this task, why did you start in the first place. The deeper your why is rooted the easier it gets to have more willpower.

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Just one last quote before I say goodbye😉


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Hope you have an amazing and blessed day with the willpower to complete your goals and achieve your dreams.

Much love & abundance

karlien09👣❤

Beautiful Japanese Terms

#1

Kintsugi: The art of precious scars

LifeGate

Scrolling through Pinterest I came across this Japanese term, Kintsugi, and felt the need to blog about it as it conveys my blog’s main message so beautifully (embrace the glorious mess that you are.) Kintsugi is built on the idea that in embracing flaws and imperfections, you can create an even stronger, more beautiful piece of art.

The philosophy behind kintsugi is to value an object’s beauty, as well as its imperfections, focusing on them equally as something to celebrate, not disguise.

From Broken To Beautiful: The Power of Kintsugi – Concrete Unicorn

I feel we have much to learn from this simple act of repairing a cracked pot with gold.

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I want you to see the cracks in two slightly different ways:

1. As pain and suffering you went through

You see, we are just like these broken and repaired pots. How these objects cracked and broke, we too crack and break sometimes, yet I am sure you’ve noticed you came out stronger because of the pain and suffering. These pots too were made stronger; being repaired, but unlike most of us who much rather hide what we’ve been through, these pots are repaired with gold, highlighting the brokenness and flaws.

We shouldn’t hide the pain or be ashamed of the journey we went through, but celebrate it and even be proud of it, for it helped shape the person we have become today. I believe we have gone through whatever we did, for a reason, even when the reason may be unclear.

Once we overcome our obstacles, and once the pain lessens, our ‘cracks get filled with gold’. The pain we went through is binding ourselves stronger together and making us ‘more beautiful’, stronger, better, and wiser.

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2. As flaws and mistakes

This brokenness of the pots is seen as flaws, just as we have many flaws of our own. I could write a book full of all my flaws and the mistakes I’ve made.

Our flaws are what makes us unique, it adds to our personality and the way we go through life. I personally love and accept most of my flaws, yet I always try to improve them, I try to fix them with ‘gold’.

Our mistakes are what make us wiser and better prepared for the future. Our mistakes can be seen as our lessons in life, our greatest and fastest teacher.

Without growth or improvement, we will stay like broken pots and be thrown into the trash after some time, instead of being repaired with gold and becoming more beautiful. We should strive for growth and improvement.

You should see the growth and improvement on your flaws and past mistakes as the gold which enhances and adds value to who you are.


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Remember: Embrace the glorious mess that you are

Hope you enjoyed the post, there will be more posts on Japenese culture to come👣

Feel free to share your thoughts related and unrelated, I always enjoy listening to what you have to say and seeing things from someone else’s perspective.

I can’t thank you enough for reading and supporting my blog

May your life be filled with much love and abundance

Enjoy this blessed day

👣❤

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