Set yourself free

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Today I came here bringing you a message -to set yourself free- so that you can go forth happily, thriving, and inspired.

Do you feel trapped by your circumstances, emotions, thoughts, and by the people around you?

Guess what?! so do most of us, but the good thing is that we have the capabilities to set ourselves free, but first we must decide to set ourselves free or continue to feel drained and caged in with nowhere to go. The truth is that happiness is a choice, and happiness also comes with being authentic and free.

Set yourself free from everything holding you back, from your negative beliefs/thoughts, from the past, from self-doubt, from anything that no longer serves you.

k.tolnoe

How to set yourself free

Take a step back, and breath

Sometimes a break and a change of perspective are all we need to continue forward. Start seeing your challenges as opportunities for growth.

Get clear on who you are, who you want to become, and what you expect out of life.

Awarness is always key!

Take out a journal and jot everything down, and be truly honest with yourself. Figure out who you are, what your values are, what will bring you more happiness, what do you stand for, what will fuel your passion, what you can do to better your life, etc.

Don’t obsess over results

Focusing on goals can become a problem because it makes us prisoners of those goals, and we only laser-focus on results. By focusing on developing the right habits, i.e., on processes, it becomes easy for us to do the things necessary for living an awesome life.

Focus on developing the right habits and to set yourself free from being obsessed with results!

One Percent Better Team

In short, become progress/habit orientated instead of result orientated.

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Get clear on your goals and vision

By knowing your goals, you can live your life accordingly Working towards something that you want to achieve for yourself will make you a lot more fulfilled and happy and make you feel less trapped or lost.

Perfection is an illusion

Stop striving for ultimate perfection, there is no such thing. By trying to be too perfect you will start to lose interest and motivation and go into a spiral of self-critique.

Push through

Sometimes the only thing we can do is keep our mouths shut and push through. In a way, this is also stepping outside of your comfort zone because you are doing something that you don’t necessarily want to do but most probably have to do.

Authenticity ~ Be your true self

Be you and do you. You don’t have to put on a fake facade to please others, the only person you need to please is you. Embrace your imperfections.

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Work on yourself

Learn to love the person you are while working on becoming your ideal version of yourself.

Stop seeking outer validation and approval

Seeking approval from others is a path of destruction. Why do we seek approval though? because of low self-esteem, because we are mean to ourselves and need others to validate our good characteristics.

Start approving of yourself. Again. Do you. Be unapologetically you. Work on yourself and praise yourself every step of the way. Selflove is key to breaking away from this toxic habit of searching for approval and validation from others.

Social media

This goes hand in hand with my previous point. If you post something or whatever else, whether other people see it or not, comment or not, etc, it shouldnt matter to you.

The other thing about social media, is it making you feel good about yourself or not, do you feel motivated and inspired or drained and negative. Watch your feelings closely when it comes to scrolling on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook, and decide for yourself whether continuing to spend endless hours scrolling is getting you where you want to be.

FOMO (Fear of missing out)

FOMO is an awful feeling and it is one of those things that can really weigh down on you. To get rid of FOMO I usually try to focus on doing something I enjoy or doing one of my tasks and convince myself that everything happens for a reason and that I don’t need them, I don’t need to be there with them, I am perfectly happy being by myself doing what I love.

Forgiveness

At some point, we have to let go of the past by forgiving those who’ve hurt us and by forgiving ourselves for the mistakes we made, after all, we are all flawed human beings and we all make mistakes. No one is perfect.

"Holding a grudge doesn't make you strong, it makes you bitter, forgiving doesn't make you weak, it sets you free". -Unknown

Set your mind to look for opportunities

Energy flows where attention goes. If you keep focusing on the thing that makes you feel trapped with no intention of finding your way out, you will most likely stay there. No one is going to save you. It is up to you to make a small shift and start to think about or see opportunities.

Step outside of your comfort zone to widen your vision. Opportunities are waiting for us at every corner, it is our job to identify them and then to take action.

Hobbies

Break away from all the stress and negative thoughts and emotions by doing something you love. Try to make time for yourself every single day. A hobby is a form of self-love.

Gratitude

I know everyone in the spiritual sense says to turn to gratitude, but I personally know that it isn’t always the easiest thing to do. We forget most times that we indeed have so many things to be grateful for. I suggest you have a small gratitude reminder that whenever you see it no matter what you’re going through that you will start to feel gratitude surfacing.

Also read:

7 ways to set yourself free

Live life in full bloom


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Today my blog reached a new milestone: 10 000 views ๐Ÿ˜€โค

I am grateful for every like, comment, share, and follower I receive. Your support means the world to me ๐ŸŒ๐Ÿ™Œ

I hope you enjoyed reading this post and that you gained some value from it.

Much love and abundance, take good care

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Thank you for joining me, feel free to share your thoughts

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Why I don’t regret anything, ever

Well, this is an interesting topic, coming from a 17-year old that hasn’t even started living life completely on her own terms, but hear me out anyhow, I’ll keep it short and sweet.

I don’t regret anything, not past mistakes, past relationships, past actions, or even encounters.

Believe me, my face still gets red with embarrassment when I think about some past events, but I still don’t regret it, I wouldn’t want to change a thing.

And then there are times that I do regret my actions or words, but only for a short while. I quickly wash them off with these beliefs…

Three beliefs I have that keeps me from feeling regret:

๐ŸŒธ The belief that everything happens for a reason.

Anything we experience has a reason behind it, even though we might not always see the reason right away. Only years later you discover that it made you stronger somehow, or that it changed your thinking for the better.

Life is designed to push us forward, and sometimes uses setbacks to launch us forward with greater might and speed.

๐ŸŒธ The belief that I can’t change my past.

(however, I have the power to change my present and future)

It already happened, and it happened the way it did, and unless I build a time machine to travel back in time, there is no use fretting over what could have been or shouldn’t have been said or done.

๐ŸŒธ The belief that I was acting/speaking accordingly to my emotions and thoughts at that time.

It’s only after doing, thinking, or saying certain things that we realize that we shouldn’t have said what we’ve said, think those thoughts, or act on our emotions in the way we did. Guess what, it’s too late now… yet we have the choice to be better.

If I had to go back in time and relive my life, I would do everything exactly the same, it made me into the woman I am becoming and into the young lady that I am.

Why regret something you have no power of changing?


I hope you enjoyed today’s post.

Much love and abundance. I hope you have a blessed day.

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Please support my new book in progress on Wattpad.
Outfoxing The Billionaire
https://www.wattpad.com/story/275839661-outfoxing-the-billionaire
Lydia Lopez, a fine businesswoman working for her father hoping to take over the company soon.

Her father although, made some wrong choices with Edward Linn and now he is forced to ask his daughter to marry Edward’s grandson or lose everything.

Why is her father in debt with Edward?
Will Lydia give in and marry Emran? or fight and live on her own terms?
Will she get to keep and run the company?


Emran Linn, the all-mighty billionaire moving back to his hometown after 21 years. He made his own wealth in Europe, but it is time to take over from his grandfather.

What does Emran think of marriage with elegant, successful, and mysterious Lydia?
Would he want her after discovering her big secret, which she has been hiding for nine years?
Will he expose her? or better yet, blackmail her?

How you start your morning determines how your day goes

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The energy you bring into your day can have a lasting effect on the rest of your day. Your intention, energy, and mindset should be used to your advantage at the beginning of each day so that you could live your day to your fullest potential and reach your goals more easily.

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Ways to improve how you start your day:

๐ŸŒธBefore going to bed at night

-visualize what you want to do and accomplish during the next day. (Set your intention)

-Set an alarm for early in the morning (My sweet spot is usually between 5 and 6 a.m) If you have work/school, set your alarm for at least 2 hours beforehand. Those two hours can help a lot each day.

If you are someone who needs many alarms to get out of bed, set one half an hour before, one for 10 minutes before and one for 5 minutes before, but get up physically at the five minutes before one so that you still have 5 more minutes to get your act together… Remember to try overtime to get rid of snoozing.

๐ŸŒธWaking up

-Wake up with a smile. I have found that this improves my mood and positivity tremendously during the day.

Each day is a blessing, and you can treat it as such with a smile.

-Don’t lay in bed longer, get out of bed.

-Make up your bed, because then you’ve already completed a simple task for the day, embedding discipline.

๐ŸŒธHave a Morning Routine

P.S this is just the tip of the iceberg of the things you can do in the morning. Find a morning routine that suits you.

-Go over your goals for the day (mentally or already have a to-do list). Look forward to completing them; mindset is important.

-Meditate/Journal/Practice gratitude/Read. Do something to improve yourself mentally and/or spiritually.

-Workout for 5-30minutes. This is also a huge mood and determination booster for me.

-Watch a morning motivational video

-Listen to morning affirmations

-Drink a glass of water. Already have a glass of water waiting for you next to your bed.

-Don’t check your social media, you’ll get distracted.


I have found most of these things listed above very helpful to improve my day, productivity, and mood.

Please feel free to share:

-anything you’ve found helpful to have a more successful day

-your morning routine or something you also do in the mornings

-any thoughts at all, related and unrelated๐Ÿค—

-something random/interesting

Thanks for readingโค

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Toward emotional intelligence

Anger fuels anger, regret shortly follow

nasty words we didn’t mean get blurted out with no return

putting your emotions through a blender, making it hard to swallow

fighting on, why are we always so stubborn

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Guilt trip and shaming to make someone feel bad

playing the victim which makes things worse

going the wrong way about it, it is kinda sad

it will only bring the bond a curse

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Nothing hurts more than disappointment

it hits deep, it reveals parts that you didn’t know existed

they held you so high and you couldn’t reach their expectations

senses overflowing with guiltiness

there is almost certainly nothing that feels worse


We need better ways to communicate our feelings. The only way we will better our communication is through better understanding our own emotions and the real why behind them.

We will only begin to get better at handling arguments, anger, and hurts if we start working on our emotional intelligence.


I struggled to get a title for this poem, it would mean a lot if you have any ideas for me๐Ÿ™ˆ

I wanted to do something else, and fun in a way, so I created this poll:

What is your response when angry, hurt or upset most of the times?

https://pollie.app/0cneq

Click the link to vote for the most suited option.

Thanks for reading, I would love to hear your thoughts on this poem and whether there is anything you would have done differently.

If you don’t mind, would you leave me a rating on this poem in the comment section from 1-10, and give a reason if it is below 6.

I truly want to improve my poem writing, it would mean a lot if you could leave a rating and any tips that you have for me.

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