How To Overcome Self-Doubt

Self-doubt is a thieve, it always has been and it always will be if we keep allowing it to be.

We all experience self-doubt at one point and some of us choose to thrive beyond it and others choose to get overwhelmed by it.

The problem with self-doubt is that we give into it for long, and it clouds our judgment and holds us back. We allow it more power over us than we ever should.

Recently I’ve been doubting myself and felt discouraged because of it. My usual self-esteem was nowhere to be seen. I am not one to doubt myself easily, but it crept up on me and I struggled to shake the feeling.

What made me doubt myself? Going through Pinterest and trying to find ways to better this blog I came across multiple bloggers who claim to make 6-7 figures from blogging a year or make $1 000’s a month, and I started to compare myself and my earnings to these standards and started to feel like such a huge failure.

We should learn to redirect our self-doubt, trust in the process, trust in ourselves, keep pushing forward, and not compare ourselves to others. We should learn to build our self-esteem.

I know that so many people doubt themselves, and I hope that this post will help change that. I hope this post can motivate you, inspire you, and build confidence in yourself.

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What is Self-Doubt

Self-doubt put simply is a lack of confidence, trust, and certainty in your abilities.

The Vibration of Self-Doubt

As you can see, feeling doubt is one of the lower vibrations.

Energy flows where attention goes. The more you focus on doubt the more the things you don’t want will find a way to manifest into your life.

And the more you focus on the doubt you feel, the more you will reaffirm to yourself that you are unworthy or incapable or not good enough.

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The Healthy Side of Self-Doubt

There is always a good side to negative emotions/circumstances. Experiencing doubt is normal and even needed sometimes.

https://mymoodpath.com/en/magazin/self-doubt/

What’s your level of self-doubt?

https://www.berkeleywellbeing.com/self-doubt.html
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🌸Comparing ourselves to others🌸

It is so easy to compare ourselves and our progress to other people and their progress. We compare ourselves to them in such a negative way that we begin to get discouraged and want to give up on whatever we’re doing.

Social media gives us easy access to amazing people to whom we compare ourselves without a second thought. We look at all they have achieved and try to compete with hundreds and even thousands of people. This is a fast track to doubting yourself.

Thank you CattleCapers for your contribution.

3 Levels of self-comparison

🌸Having expectations for a certain outcome🌸

We put so much pressure on ourselves to get to a certain outcome. We become disappointed and discouraged when we don’t achieve a certain level of success in a certain amount of time.

🌸Imposter Syndrome🌸

Imposter syndrome is that small voice that tells you that you are a fraud, that questions your credibility for doing things, and makes you feel undeserving of your achieved successes. 

🌸Questioning our abilities/thoughts/beliefs🌸

Usually, when we experience a change in mindset we start to question the path we’re on and our actions and influences on it.

This may not always be a bad thing, but it can lead to self-doubt.

🌸Important people who are negative🌸

We sometimes value the opinions of people close to us over our own, or we start to question whether our own thoughts are valuable.

🌸Encountering setbacks/obstacles🌸

When things don’t turn out the way we had hoped we tend to become negative and let doubt seep into our core.

Feeling stuck is also another gateway to self-doubt.

Self-doubt is a Thieve

Self-doubt steals from us because we allow it to. It keeps us from moving forward and can even cause us to go backward. It steals our confidence, our trust in our abilities, our trust in God/The Universe, and our trust in the path we have chosen for ourselves.

So many people of greatness, people who have achieved and created amazing things have experienced doubt and imposter syndrome before, but they didn’t allow it to stop them, and you shouldn’t either.

Let’s say that you continue to doubt yourself and throw all your goals and already achieved accomplishments in the dustbin. Where would you be in a week from now? still doubting whether you are worthy… In a month from now? wanting to go back, try again, but still doubting yourself… In a year from now? most likely full of regret. Ten years from now? maybe you’ll wonder why you were so caught up in your thoughts and didn’t just hold on a little longer and push through to see where it might’ve led you.

Doubting ourselves is to put ourselves on a path of regret and what-ifs, rather than lessons learned and successes gained.

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How to Eliminate Self-Doubt

I overcame my self-doubt by reminding myself to simply take the next step and not look at the whole staircase and trusting that I am getting to my destination at my own time and speed and that I have nothing to rush, nothing to worry about, and no one to compare myself with.

🌸Whatever you are in doubt of, continue doing it anyways🌸

Push through. Keep on taking the necessary actions, even when you are in doubt. Don’t allow doubt to hold you back.

“If you hear a voice within you say you cannot paint, then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced.”

– Vincent Van Gogh

🌸Strenghten your self-esteem and confidence🌸

Self-doubt is most likely caused by your lack of self-esteem and confidence, therefore it is your job to build it back up again.

  • Use positive self-talk. Be kind and encouraging to yourself. Talk to yourself with love and compassion.
  • Affirmations and Incantations.
  • Focus on your strengths.
  • Build up your knowledge and experience related to what you want to achieve.
  • Do more of what you love.
  • Try something new, step outside of your comfort zone.

Confidence is a skill

🌸Reevaluate your self-worth🌸

Your sense of self-worthiness shouldn’t increase or decrease by external factors like achievements or the opinions of others.

You are worthy simply because. And if you don’t believe that, it is time for a change in your mindset and beliefs.

Understand your worth

This also means to not compare yourself to others.

🌸Gain new insights🌸

Look for things and action steps that you can improve upon to have a better experience and outcome.

Find new insights, do some research, and you may find yourself discovering vital pivot points that will give you the necessary push in the right direction.

You can even ask someone you trust for help or honest insights.

🌸Journal🌸

Some journal questions for you:

  • What made you start in the first place?
  • Why did you keep doing it for so long?
  • What have you achieved so far?
  • Are you proud of how far you’ve come?
  • Do you still enjoy doing it?
  • What makes you doubt yourself?… why is this?
  • Would it be worth it to stop now and let doubt have the upper hand?
  • What would happen if you fail?
  • How do you define success

🌸Meditation and breathwork🌸

Meditation helps us look within and reevaluate our mindset and thoughts in a nonjudgemental way.

Breathwork is also great for clearing the mind and taking a step back.

🌸Trust the Process🌸

You’ve already come so far, why stop now? Put a little trust in yourself, believe that you are exactly where you are meant to be and that great things are yet to come.

Learn to trust and keep a positive and open mindset. Learn to trust your abilities and your own path and realize that everything happens as it should. We try too much to control everything, instead, we should let go a little, live a little and put a whole lot of faith and trust in the Universe/God.

🌸Turn to Gratitude🌸

There is always something to be grateful for. Always. Sometimes it is just a little harder to find those things or to be truly grateful. Turning to gratitude is the fastest way to reform your life and help you take the right steps forward with the right mindset.

The power of Gratitude

🌸Take a small break and have a good nights rest and start with a fresh and clear mind🌸

Go to bed and remind yourself that the following day is a new day and a new opportunity to do better. Start your morning with the determination to keep pushing forward.

How you start your morning determines how your day goes

Breaks are necessary for survival

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Inspiring Quotes on Self Doubt

Doing what is best for you

You should respect yourself enough to be able to do what is best for you.

You will live a much more happy and fulfilled life once you start doing what is best for you.

Doing what is best for you means to make decisions that will benefit you, and make you feel better about who you are. Stop feeling bad for wanting to put yourself first, you may not see it as I do, but you are way more important for you to look after than anybody else, and the more you look after yourself, the more capable of looking after others you become.

Do what is best for you so that you can become your very best version.

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How you can do what is best for you

👣Use your time and energy wisely

Something bad, but minor just happened, do you spend hours ranting, complaining, or feeling mad about it? Is it serving you to feel this way? You could have used all that time and bad energy and put it towards something better.

👣Goals

You probably have goals, work on achieving them.

If you don’t have goals, get out a piece of paper and think about what it is you want.

Where is it getting you to not work on your goals? Where could you have been if only you did what you wanted to do. Start now and stop waiting.

👣Stop the people pleasing act

There lies great value in helping people, but there also lies attachment to gaining validation. The moment you want to help a person to feed your ego, you are people pleasing.

👣Do what you have to do until you can do what you want to

Make sure you dont procrastinate doing tasks to a point where they are completely delayed or incomplete.

Get your grind on and take care of all your responsibilities

👣Adopt a Growth mindset

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👣Watch out for toxic/unexceptable relationships/behavior

The longer you stay in something that is not good for you, the harder it will be to let go.

Inconsistent behavior and flakiness are poor foundations for a relationship, and suggest a lack of respect. Self-respecting people have no time for those who waste their time.

They also refuse to tolerate any kind of abuse or poor treatment.
http://powerfulmind.co/start-doing-whats-best-for-you/

👣Live a healthy lifestyle

You have probably heard these things a million times, but its because it is the truth:

  • Exercise regularly
  • Drink water
  • Keep a water bottle while you work on something
  • Keep your environment clean
  • Have house plants, or an air purifier
  • ect.

👣Understand your worth

You should know your value. You should know whether someone is worthy of spending time with you. I am saying to do this in a humbling manner, it is more about spending your time with people who are worth it.

👣Find work you love and give it your all

Okay, we are still in the middle of a pandemic and jobs are being lost day by day and it becomes harder to keep a job never mind getting a new one, but I believe you can still do other things you are passionate about and turn it into your job over time.

With the right mindset, enough willpower, dedication, and passion you can make anything work.

👣Do the right thing

You will feel better about yourself for standing up for what you believe in or protecting someone when being wronged or even for rather telling the truth than lying. This will help you build your self-worth and self-respect.

👣Try to avoid gossip

I enjoy gossip, but I’ve seen what negative effects it can have both internally and externally. If you want to do what is best for you, you will commit to better conversation and stay away from mindless gossip.

Do you feel good after gossiping, after dragging someone’s name through the mud?

👣Fomo-fear of missing out

When experiencing FOMO, and you decided to miss out on a party or event because you have things you have or want to do, remember your reasons. Whatever you are doing is probably much worth than hours spent talking nonsense and being somewhere that will get you nowhere. You are missing out for a reason, and why see it as missing out when you chose to do something more worth your time.

👣Embrace making changes

When something doesn’t feel right, or if something no longer serves you, embrace making changes.

👣Make yourself proud

👣What it means to truly love yourself

👣Set yourself free

👣Live life in full bloom

👣How you start your morning determines how your day goes

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Poem– I have to do what’s best for me

Our connection is something devine

so I stuck by your side for the longest time

aware of the path that is full of self distruction

but oh, how can you say no to the sweet seduction

~

You gave me a one year trial

I know now where ‘us’ would lead

I’ve known months ago, but I was in denial

For the last time, my heart shall bleed

~

You were all I ever wanted

but your inconsistant behavior made me fix my vision

a journey of self-love and development has started

I had made my final decision

~

I have to give up on us, for me

No longer will I be

trapped in an unwanted reality

Now I finally see

I have to do what’s best for me

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Quotes:


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I hope you enjoyed this post, feel free to share any experiences, thoughts, or anything random with me in the comment section.

Sending some love and abundance to you on this beautiful Saturday!

Thank you for visiting 😉❤

Set yourself free

🌸🌸🌸

Today I came here bringing you a message -to set yourself free- so that you can go forth happily, thriving, and inspired.

Do you feel trapped by your circumstances, emotions, thoughts, and by the people around you?

Guess what?! so do most of us, but the good thing is that we have the capabilities to set ourselves free, but first we must decide to set ourselves free or continue to feel drained and caged in with nowhere to go. The truth is that happiness is a choice, and happiness also comes with being authentic and free.

Set yourself free from everything holding you back, from your negative beliefs/thoughts, from the past, from self-doubt, from anything that no longer serves you.

k.tolnoe

How to set yourself free

Take a step back, and breath

Sometimes a break and a change of perspective are all we need to continue forward. Start seeing your challenges as opportunities for growth.

Get clear on who you are, who you want to become, and what you expect out of life.

Awarness is always key!

Take out a journal and jot everything down, and be truly honest with yourself. Figure out who you are, what your values are, what will bring you more happiness, what do you stand for, what will fuel your passion, what you can do to better your life, etc.

Don’t obsess over results

Focusing on goals can become a problem because it makes us prisoners of those goals, and we only laser-focus on results. By focusing on developing the right habits, i.e., on processes, it becomes easy for us to do the things necessary for living an awesome life.

Focus on developing the right habits and to set yourself free from being obsessed with results!

One Percent Better Team

In short, become progress/habit orientated instead of result orientated.

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Get clear on your goals and vision

By knowing your goals, you can live your life accordingly Working towards something that you want to achieve for yourself will make you a lot more fulfilled and happy and make you feel less trapped or lost.

Perfection is an illusion

Stop striving for ultimate perfection, there is no such thing. By trying to be too perfect you will start to lose interest and motivation and go into a spiral of self-critique.

Push through

Sometimes the only thing we can do is keep our mouths shut and push through. In a way, this is also stepping outside of your comfort zone because you are doing something that you don’t necessarily want to do but most probably have to do.

Authenticity ~ Be your true self

Be you and do you. You don’t have to put on a fake facade to please others, the only person you need to please is you. Embrace your imperfections.

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Work on yourself

Learn to love the person you are while working on becoming your ideal version of yourself.

Stop seeking outer validation and approval

Seeking approval from others is a path of destruction. Why do we seek approval though? because of low self-esteem, because we are mean to ourselves and need others to validate our good characteristics.

Start approving of yourself. Again. Do you. Be unapologetically you. Work on yourself and praise yourself every step of the way. Selflove is key to breaking away from this toxic habit of searching for approval and validation from others.

Social media

This goes hand in hand with my previous point. If you post something or whatever else, whether other people see it or not, comment or not, etc, it shouldnt matter to you.

The other thing about social media, is it making you feel good about yourself or not, do you feel motivated and inspired or drained and negative. Watch your feelings closely when it comes to scrolling on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook, and decide for yourself whether continuing to spend endless hours scrolling is getting you where you want to be.

FOMO (Fear of missing out)

FOMO is an awful feeling and it is one of those things that can really weigh down on you. To get rid of FOMO I usually try to focus on doing something I enjoy or doing one of my tasks and convince myself that everything happens for a reason and that I don’t need them, I don’t need to be there with them, I am perfectly happy being by myself doing what I love.

Forgiveness

At some point, we have to let go of the past by forgiving those who’ve hurt us and by forgiving ourselves for the mistakes we made, after all, we are all flawed human beings and we all make mistakes. No one is perfect.

"Holding a grudge doesn't make you strong, it makes you bitter, forgiving doesn't make you weak, it sets you free". -Unknown

Set your mind to look for opportunities

Energy flows where attention goes. If you keep focusing on the thing that makes you feel trapped with no intention of finding your way out, you will most likely stay there. No one is going to save you. It is up to you to make a small shift and start to think about or see opportunities.

Step outside of your comfort zone to widen your vision. Opportunities are waiting for us at every corner, it is our job to identify them and then to take action.

Hobbies

Break away from all the stress and negative thoughts and emotions by doing something you love. Try to make time for yourself every single day. A hobby is a form of self-love.

Gratitude

I know everyone in the spiritual sense says to turn to gratitude, but I personally know that it isn’t always the easiest thing to do. We forget most times that we indeed have so many things to be grateful for. I suggest you have a small gratitude reminder that whenever you see it no matter what you’re going through that you will start to feel gratitude surfacing.

Also read:

7 ways to set yourself free

Live life in full bloom


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Today my blog reached a new milestone: 10 000 views 😀❤

I am grateful for every like, comment, share, and follower I receive. Your support means the world to me 🌍🙌

I hope you enjoyed reading this post and that you gained some value from it.

Much love and abundance, take good care

🌸🌸🌸

Thank you for joining me, feel free to share your thoughts

🌸🌸🌸

Live life in full bloom

1st of September already! time surely flew by this year, or is it just me? There are only 4 months/124 days left before 2022

Today is officially Spring in South Africa (although it doesn’t quite feel like it yet), and I was looking for spring quotes and came across this one: Live life in full bloom. And immediately I felt inspired after having such a long day and felt the need to share.

What it means to live life in full bloom

Living life in full bloom means living with hope and purpose, with imagination and vision, in a way that honors the Earth, the spirit, and one another ~ Elizabeth Murray

I also see it as living life to the fullest, giving your all and your best, bringing happiness to yourself and others, doing what you love, and going after your wildest dreams.

How to live life in full bloom

I think the best way to live life in full bloom is by being/becoming our ideal selves. Think about it, your best self is most probably happy, energized, creative, passionate, loving, fun, and whatever it may be for you.

Becoming your ideal self is a concept I have recently started to take more seriously, it is a concept I believe everyone should understand. After all, we are either moving forward or moving backward. Embrace the glorious mess that you blend in so well with this concept because it means to fully accept yourself as you are while also working on yourself and becoming your best/ideal self.

🐾Prioritise what is important to you.

Do what makes you happy, and everything else will fall into place. 

🐾Put energy into your goals/hobbies

🐾Take more risks

You should make it a point to step outside of your comfort zone, it almost always guarantees growth.

🐾Show your appreciation to the ones you love.

🐾Be more present

Your past is important to learn from. Your future is important to work towards. Though the only thing that truly exists is now. You can practice gratitude and mindfulness to be more present.

🐾Get clear on who your ideal self is for you.

Do something today that brings you closer to that ideal version of you.

🐾Just do anything that makes your soul happy, joyous, calm, grateful, loved, etc.

🐾Today my teacher told me we have to have small things that bring us happiness, and it is very true. For me, it is reading, improving myself in one way or another, sitting outside on the grass, and drinking my favorite coffee.

How to re-energize your spirit when you feel drained

I felt drained these past few days and also heard classmates complain about the same thing, and this morning I was listening to a video where Abraham Hicks basically says that our emotions are our indicator for whether we are in harmony with who we are or whether we aren’t. It is our job to keep track of our negative emotions and work through them or make much-needed changes.

🦋 Find a way to unleash your inner child through something that brings you true joy, something that makes you smile brightly from the inside out.

🦋 Do some exercises, whether full on fitness or yoga, or even dancing, it doesn’t have to be a lot, just get your body moving.

🦋 Like I’ve mentioned before, gratitude! You can start a gratitude journal.

The power of Gratitude

🦋 Get a good night’s rest while listening to Subliminals/affirmations while you sleep.

🦋 Watch something inspirational/motivational or a comedy or watch a show that you’ve already seen but would totally watch it again.

🦋 Take a step back from everything that makes it feel as if it is weighing down on your shoulders, and shift your focus.


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Happy Spring!

It isn’t spring for everybody, so happy autumn too🍁

I hope you enjoyed this post

Much love and abundance 🙏❤

Spring quotes:

🦋🦋🦋

Average Sucks

Join this challenge along with me, it is completely FREE.

VIP access is about $40

Michael Bernoff’s 5-day Average Sucks Challenge 8th-12th February https://email.numerologist.com/a/109/click/9270109/750097203/_9c817b4b96cbe97b4f6c54ab49c659e50fbc2f6b/8c9f9335121daf5631ac37fc2aec6eb2aee683e8

‘Average sucks’ is a motivational quote on its own, for me, it is anyway.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to be average. That is probably why I started this blog, you may deem it as average where you are from, but I certainly don’t, I don’t know anyone else in my town who blogs. So blogging in itself is already an above-average hobby in my eyes.

‘Average sucks.’ In a way, it motivates me to strive for better and for more, to accomplish more, to push myself and my limits and stop holding back in any way.

Being average sounds lame.

So take advantage of this free challenge, who knows, maybe it will be life-changing🔥👣

Have an amazing weekend and maybe see how you can make it a weekend that is above average for yourself, see how you can accomplish it in the simplest ways.


Last weekend I went to see this waterfall with my boyfriend alongside two other couples. And on top, we took a swim in the river. We also tasted black wine that was brought from Cape-Town that is 2 000km away.

In my eyes, to go swim in the river was above average, because it was something I had never done.

My heart got stuck in my throat at a point. My boyfriend nearly scared me to death and on purpose! So, as I mentioned we swam in the river at the top. There are some points in the river that are a bit deeper, and I was sitting alone in the river, feeling the pull of the waters, while the rest was sitting outside the river on rocks chatting. Mind you the water was a bit freezing, but I enjoyed it. My boyfriend came to join me and when he entered the river, he vanished under the water. Just like that. One second there, the next one he is gone. And obviously, it a river (and the waterfall is just around the corner), and his body was pulled for another about 5-10 meters or so and in a way, I am trying to get to him. My insides were loaded with panic. So then he stood up laughing, and I immediately knew it was done on purpose. Unbelievable!😲😂

He loves testing me with every chance he gets in any way he can. At this point, I think he knows me better than I know myself. Life with him never has a dull moment, that is one thing for sure.

Okay, I’m going to say goodbye now.

Thanks for reading, hope I didn’t bore you till death.

Have an above-average day! or try to at least🤗

👣❤